Life on the Swingset: The Podcast

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

The Gentleperverts' Social Club

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

Intellectual Foreplay

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

Sex Ed A Go Go

Sex Ed A Go-Go is one part sex q&a, one part comedy show and a whole lot of fun. Get the ins and outs of in between the sheets naughtiness from Lola and the Pussy Posse!

The Don't Panic Podcast

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

Tell Me Something Good

A live sexy storytelling event in Toronto and a Swingset.FM podcast, both created and organized by Sophie Delancey and Samantha Fraser. We believe that storytelling brings people together. Whether it's from revealing shared experiences or opening eyes to new ways of thinking, TMSG storytelling is honest, it's raw, and it's sexy.


Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

The Kinky Geeks

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

Pedestrian Polyamory

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

Eat The Rudecast – A Podcast about Hannibal

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

A Damn Good Podcast about Twin Peaks

Life on the Swingset is a podcast and website about swinging, polyamory, and open relationships from the trenches. Through debates, interviews, and sexy discussions, The Swingset Crew tackles sex, relationships, and their accompanying accoutrements, and what it means to be open sexually in a world that’s often closed.

#401 – Kissing is Taboo Again? – Elevator Speeches & Safety

How did kissing become so complicated... again? Swinger culture still features a choice, to kiss or not to kiss, that other non-monogamous folk don't usually make. These days, the stakes around kissing are higher, and that's complicated things as simple as kissing to say hello . Ginger, Prof, Tonia, Dylan, Lunabelle, Tonya, and Tyler get

#400 – ReEmergence

Dylan, Ginger, Tonia, and Prof get back together to properly toast Life on the Swingset's 400th episode! The crew invites back Lunabelle, Tyler, and Tonya, and welcomes D into the fold to discuss ReEmergence and discovering intimacy... again. The crew discusses what returning to normal might look like during a time ... very much not

SS 399: We Go Meta on Swinging and Making the Sausage… and talk Sex Toys – from Friday Night Delights from February 5th, 2021

Ginger, Prof, Tonia, and Dylan get together on a normal Friday in February 2021 to plan a podcast about swinging... and almost fall into the trap of talking about swinging. Swingset gets meta, discussing swinging as a verb, swinger as a noun, new england accents, and ...talking about Sportsheets and sex toys and restraints. a

SS 398: Swingset as a Place… with Princess Vi

Princess Vi and I talk about what it means to build pop-up inclusive, welcoming, and sex friendly communities, and we wander about discussing what goes into that secret sauce... and what it feels like when you get it right, and ... when you don't have it. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make

SS 397: …and at least one amorous bird on this resort. – Swingset Takes Desire 2022, Part 2

Continuing on from Part 1 of our live podcast on our trip in Cancun, Ginger initiates a tonal shift, Keeley makes sure everyone knows that more than gang bangs happen, Cooper talks about birds, Prof shares more deep thoughts, Tonia shares joy while serving the people, Ginger makes sure everyone knows that gang bangs happen,

SS 396: …what sets us apart, brings us together. – Swingset Takes Desire 2022, Part 1

Swingset is a place, at least that's how we think of it today. We created the Swingset Community for the tenth time at Desire Resort in Cancun, QR, MX, and gathered our attendees to listen to Keeley, Cooper, Ginger, Tonia, Ryan AKA The Professor, and Dylan get together and talk about the trip up until

SS 395: The Trouble with Tribbing, a Sexy Story Share

Ginger, The Professor, Mike Joseph, Tonia, and Dylan get together for a Friday Night Delights recorded on June 25th to share some sexy stories and talk about growing relationships and sharing managing multiple identities, Also... big gong energy and tribbing. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels

SS 394: Camp Swingset Live! – At the Half-Baked Homestead

Tonia and Dylan sat down at the Half-Baked Homestead, lovingly put together by Rapunzel, Colin, and Oengus, to talk about what Swingset gatherings mean (if anything) and what we try to do when we put temporary community together. Talk touches on current events - the attack on trans familities rights to exist, a post roe

SS 393: Swingset Takes Desire 2021 LIVE in Cancún!

Life on the Swingset returns to Cancún to retake Desire in 2021!  Special guests Eve Rickert and Lyndzi and co-hosts Mike Joseph and Keeley join Cooper, Tonia, and Dylan to talk about their experiences on-resort after choosing to defer the 2020 trip, and invite audience members to comment, cheer, and jeer!   You can find

SS 392: Personal Stories on Changing Intimacy Over the Last Two Years – A Friday Night Delights Conversation with Catherine

We continue the conversation from SS 388: The Power of Witness in Relationship Therapy, by sliding into how intimacy has changed over the last couple of years. Dylan, Ryan, and Ginger continues to welcome Catherine of Expansive Connection while Tonia joins in on the fun! Also... more love for Gestalt therapy! Help support Life on

SS 391: The Desire Mid-Week Check-In, featuring Co-Hosts Mike Joseph and Keeley!

We made it to Desire in 2021 and decided to take the temperature of the room... the very, very hot room that we couldn't turn the air conditioning on in because it would have ruined the recording environment. Cooper, Dylan, and Tonia along with guest co-hosts Mike Joseph and Keeley get together and check in

SS 390: “Things can be messy, but things don't have to be toxic.”

With this episode, we emerge from our reduced pandemic release schedule where our focus was on virtual Swingset community events to connect and sustain us through challenging times, and refocus on the podcast. We invited Eve, Marissa, Celeste, Rose, and Melanie with an intimate conversation about navigating toxic relationships. We're grateful for these five courageous

SS 389: Nerdy Banter with Simone and Malcolm – The Pragmatist's Guide to Sexuality

Join Dylan, Ryan aka Prof, and Ginger in a nerdy discussion about sexuality data and human behavior. Simone and Malcolm Collins, the authors of The Pragmatist’s Guide series, take to the Swingset to talk all manner of intriguing and confounding sexiness. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live

SS 388: The Power of Witness in Relationship Therapy with Catherine

Join Dylan, Ryan, and Ginger as they host Catherine of Expansive Connection. Catherine offers her perspective on relationship therapy and her Power of Witness experience. It can be a challenge for those in polyamorous, open, and multipartnered relationships to find qualified helping professionals who not just tolerate nontraditional relationships, but elevate and celebrate the strengths

SS 387: Euretic Consent with Shawn Coleman and Kevin Patterson

Shawn Coleman and Kevin Patterson join Ginger Bentham, Ryan Bentham, and Dylan Thomas, to discuss consent. They talk practicing consent in every day life. "Consent has to exist in our every day lives and not just be a concept in the legal system." The concept of euretic consent, a term Shawn Coleman has offered the

SS 386: Thank You Betty Dodson – On Bodysex and More – Friday Night Delights – 2020-08-14 (Part 2)

Tonia, Dylan, Ryan the Prof, and Ginger unwind with the Swingsetters after a busy workweek to delight in the Delights on a Friday night for an eclectic array of conversations. Ginger gets on a roll sharing about her double mastectomy and DIEP flap reconstruction, and then doubles (heh) down to worship Betty Fucking Dodson and

SS 385: The Shame of Desire, the Consideration of Risk – Friday Night Delights

Ginger, Tonia, Ryan aka Prof, and Dylan get together for a night of Friday Night Drinking and Delights and accidentally have a deep conversation about desire, shame, selfishness, risk-aware relative to sex and COVID-19, exposure networks and the complication of the return of feelings of jealousy and selfishness, but not before engaging in discussion on:

SS 384: A is for Adequate – Friday Night Delights with Cooper, Bradford, and Angela – 2020-06-26

Shame kinks. Pubic hair. Quarantine Partners. Australia. We're covering all our bases today with Ginger Bentham, Dylan Thomas, Cooper S. Beckett, The Professor, and Angela and Bradford from the By the Bi podcast! Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us

SS 383: Black and Poly in These Times

Ruby Johnson LCSW takes over Life on the Swingset and brings Dr. Justin Clardy, Thomas of and Vision By Thomas,  Charita Marie, and Jhen from the Monogamish Podcast to offer their experiences being black and polyamorous in the midst of covid and the uprising. You can find Ruby Johnson LCSW on Twitter and Instagram

SS 382: My Damn Gangbang Got Cancelled By COVID – Friday Night Delights – 2020-04-17

It's clear from Life on the Swingset reviews that the first episode people listen to greatly shape opinions about the show. If this is your first, getting angry over gangbangs being cancelled, talking about Con Air (the movie) and hair dye is par for the course. Enjoy listening to Dylan Thomas, Tonia Thomas, Ginger Bentham,

SS 381: COVID-19 and STI Stigma, with Ella Dawson – Friday Night Delights – 2020-05-22

Ella Dawson joins Ginger, the Professor, and Dylan to discuss reactions to people with / without COVID-19, and how it may affect public discussion surrounding STIs and stigma surrounding people living with STIs. Ella Dawson gave a TEDx Talk about how STIs aren't a consequence, they're inevitable. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to

SS 380.5 – An Edible Sized Multiorgasmic Nonejaculatory Minisode – Friday Night Delights – 2020-04-10 (Part 2)

Coming off an episode about snowballs, needles in clits, and edibles, Ginger, Prof, and Dylan attempt to drink more and largely fail as Ginger's computer died, Prof laughed, and Dylan couldn't pronounce words. Welcome to the minisode! Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into

SS 380: A Sensual Snowball Behind My Back – Friday Night Delights 2020-04-10 (Part One)

Another night in April, another Friday Night Delights! Dylan, Ginger, and The Professor get together and talk butt stuff, pins in clits, drinks and edibles, and somehow find ways to come to profound understandings of each other in the current context of the world. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and

SS 379: The Hangover – The Krazy Winter Nights Steakhouse Postshow

Dylan, Cooper, Ryan, and Ginger found their way out into the frozen landscape of Omaha in January in search of meat, tantalizing steaks that is. During this Swingset field trip during Krazy Winter Nights, the foursome relaxes into a feast paired with cocktails and delicious conversation. Recording on location at the steak house means just like

SS 378: Don't Invest in the Rest, Invest in… the Sex. Also Malört. – Friday Night Delights – 2020-04-03, Part 3

Our April 3rd Friday Night Delights with the Swingset has proven quite fertile. Mr. and Mrs. H (@BedHoppersUK) sign off after fucking while podcasting while Tonia (@tonia_swingset) signs on.  Dylan (@DylantheThomas / @DylantheThomas@Swingset.Social), Lunabelle (@Ninjasexology) and Bradford, Angela, and Ian the Gentlemen (@BytheBiPodcast) reminisce about good times at Desire 2019 (and a desire for a

SS 377: Shaving with Straight Razors and Podcasting HARDER, Friday Night Delights – 2020-04-03, Part 2

Our April 3rd Friday Night Lights with the Swingset episode continues featuring Dylan Thomas, Mr. and Mrs. H (The Bedhoppers), Angela, Bradford and Ian (By the Bi), and Lunabelle. Out of this group of seven, one and a half adults appear. "GO ON, PODCAST HARDER" - Mr. H "It's my goal to get married couples

IF 022: Flogging and Magic – Part II

While the world has indeed shifted since Ginger and Ryan recorded this meandering conversation about plans for 2020, the commitment to personal growth is as important as ever. Enjoy this second half of their deep and optimistic musings on one lovely Sunday afternoon.     Send feedback or suggestions for topics to Ginger and Prof!

SS 376: The British Commonwealth Bidet Invasion – Friday Night Delights – 2020-04-03

Today's episode was recorded live in front of a Patron supporter live audience! As part of our Friday Night Delights series, Mister and Mrs H, Angela, Bradford, and Ian The Gentlemen joined Dylan for an accidental pre-show for our regularly scheduled Friday Night Delights episode on April 3rd, 2020. It's possible we've hit peak anus,

SS 375: Connection and Love During Unprecedented Times – Friday Night Delights with the Swingset

Ginger Bentham and Dylan Thomas get together with Swingset patrons to connect about connection, both with the people around us and in our communities. In uncertain times, we're making changes to keep ourselves and others safe from COVID-19 while still finding ways to be human to each other... and kind to ourselves. They also get

SS 374: Unf_ck Your Polyamory with Dr. Liz and Kevin Patterson

Dylan and Ginger host Kevin Patterson and Dr. Liz Powell to discuss their new educational project: Unf_ck Your Polyamory. Whether it is relating to metamours, balancing time with partners, or communication, communication, communication, sustaining fulfilling polyamorous relationships requires a commitment to personal growth. Kevin and Dr. Liz are here to help! Help support Life on

SS 373: Pushing Your Boundaries – Live at Krazy Winter Nights 2020!

Ginger Bentham, Ryan (The Professor) Bentham, Dylan Thomas, and Cooper S. Beckett braved the great white northern territories of Maine and Chicago to travel to the great white northern territory of Omaha, NE to attend Krazy Winter Nights 2020! Their session, Pushing Your Boundaries, featured each member of the Swingset Crew relaying both their early

IF 021: Flogging and Magic – Part I

It's a Sunday morning, well, afternoon actually after an especially adventurous night. Ginger and Ryan are lounging in the afterglow. The conversation then turns deep and introspective as they explore where their paths have taken them over the last year. From flogging to magic to future intentions, join Gin and Prof as they contemplate how

SS 372: Finding Quality Information About Open Relationships with Emma and Fin

Dylan, Ryan, and Ginger invite Emma and Fin from Normalizing Non-monogamy onto the Swingset to discuss finding quality information about how to open your relationship. When getting started in consensual non-monogamy, it is easy to get overwhelmed by the volume of information available. This discussion includes strategies and advice for finding quality guidance, as well

SS 371: The Whole Damn Preshow – Live before Krazy Winter Nights 2020!

Ginger, Ryan, Dylan, and Cooper get together on Krazy Winter Nights 2020 eve, grab some Denny's, and ... a convertrainwreck follows. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on

SS 370: Parenting While Solo Polyamorous and More

Dylan and Ginger invite Lunabelle and Tikva, of Kimchi Cuddles, to talk parenting: what it is like to parent solo when you are polyamorous and what it's like to be solo polyamorous as a parent. Inspired by a listener question, the group dives deeper into the the practicalities and the the lived experience of parenting

SS 369: A Sex Toy Story

Dylan, Tonia, Ginger, Ryan the Prof, and Lunabelle share their experiences with incorporating sex toys into play. The weird, the intimidating, the playful, and the practical, all have a place in the action if everyone is agreeable. The group talks about when things have gone awry and when the toys made play transcendent. Climb up

SS 368: Gangbang the Mailbag 40: More Action with Bex and Kevin

Bex Caputo and Kevin Patterson join Dylan and Ginger on the Swingset to give perspectives on some listener questions. From sharing you are polyamorous with your partner for the first time, to thoughts for an adventurous "unicorn," to navigating group sex, these listeners asked and the Swingset answered. And buy Kevin's fantastic new book, "For

OTWC 39 – Texting, Sexting, and Messaging

There's a certain art to crafting the right kind of message to convey what we're feeling via characters on a screen. Since so much of modern communication is done on said screens it can be a lot of work figuring out your personal style and mode of messaging. Non-monogamous people spend extra time communicating with

SS 367: Gangbang the Mailbag 39 with Bex Caputo and Kevin Patterson

That Swingset mailbag we all know and love was getting pretty full of listener questions. And since there is always a swing available on the Swingset, Dylan and Ginger invited Bex Caputo and Kevin Patterson to share their wisdom. The foursome takes on questions about mono-polyam relationship sustainability, supporting your partner's dating life, and finds

SS 366: Swingset Takes Desire 8.0, Live at Desire Resort & Spa in Cancún!

A resort full of Swingsetters walks into an oceanside you may imagine chaos and heartfelt moments ensue. Amidst the sea of sexies, Dylan, Ginger, and Cooper reflect on the eighth annual Desire Riviera Maya takeover with one magical night yet ahead. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on

SS 365: Podcast Gangbang in Paradise! (feat. By the Bi and The Bedhoppers)

Dylan, Tonia, Ginger, Ryan, Ophelia, and Cooper arrive early to the gorgeous ocean-side live podcast venue. They host Mr and Mrs H, the Bedhoppers, and Angela and Bradford of the By the Bi podcast for paradise-fueled, freeform, live podcast foreplay. As the gazebo starts to fill with Swingsetters, this large and motley crew discuss the

SS 364: Dispatches from Desire

Dylan, Tonia, Ryan the Prof, and Ginger fall into a few stolen moments on the eighth annual Swingset Takes Desire trip. With the sounds of the ocean and the hot tub in the background, they each take turns waxing philosophical about whatever topic seems to float through their paradise-addled minds. Not quite a bad cast,

IF 020: Creating Smooth Sailing in Relationship Communication

Ginger and Ryan take you for another sail while they reflect on communication in relationships. Healthy and unhealthy, effective and ineffective, and strategies for moving through the simultaneity of emotion and challenging communication. In this longer episode the first fifteen minutes of the journey are breezier than usual, but hang with it, dear listeners, sailing

OTWC 38 – Accountability and Consent – On The Wet Coast

Accountability and Consent can feel like the least fun topics to discuss when it comes to sexy lifestyles but when we really focus on building these factors in a way that lets go of the definitions used by the justice system and focuses on the subjective experiences of the parties, our kink and sexytimes can

SS 363: Premature Desirejaculation

Join Dylan, Tonia, Ginger, Ryan (aka Prof), and the Swinger Doc as they storytell and anticipate the eighth Swingset Takes Desire trip. This annual bacchanal brings with it the excitement of anticipation (read: foreplay) and the exhilaration of dreams come true. As reminiscences morph into future possibilities, listen in as desires are laid bare. And really

SS 362: Keeping the Sexy in Risk Aware Sex

Dylan, Tonia, Ginger, and Ryan (aka Prof) are excited to invite the Swinger Doc back onto the Swingset. As the Swinger Doc says, "Be safe but be sexy!" Stewarding your sexual health and deciding for yourself what risk aware means for you are facets of living in the consensually non-monogamous world. The crew discusses all

IF 019: Coming About and About Coming

Ginger and Ryan get frisky and talk orgasms while sailing. While orgasms obtained by any method are delightful, some climaxes create a little more toe curlin' than others. Ginger puts Ryan on the spot to name his top five ways to orgasm and she returns the favor. Come aboard! (Heh.)   Send feedback or suggestions

OTWC 037 – Disappointing Dates – On The Wet Coast

It's no secret that On The Wet Coast, we love our sex toys. Using those toys for strap-on sex is one of our favourite ways to engage with partners, or watch our partners engage with others. Though in some ways it is as simple as popping a dildo in a harness and getting to work,

SS 360: Sustaining Open Relationships Through Life's Challenges (Part One), Live at #Naughty2019

Dylan, Ginger, and Ryan present live in front of an audience at Naughty in N'awlins. Not your typical swinger convention topic, the trio share their heartfelt stories about loss, health and medical trauma, and facing death. It's not often on the Swingset that the crew shares about such heavy and activating topics, so choose wisely

SS 361: Sustaining Open Relationships Through Life's Challenges (Part Two), Live at #Naughty2019

Dylan, Ginger, and Ryan present live in front of an audience at Naughty in N'awlins for part two of their panel, Sustaining Open Relationships through Life's Challenges. Not your typical swinger convention topic, the trio share their heartfelt stories about loss, health and medical trauma, and facing death. It's not often on the Swingset that

SS 359: Reviews and Riffin'

Dylan and Ginger hang out with the Swingset patrons for a live podcast of reviews, listener questions, and some ridiculousness. Ryan The Professor makes his way into this episode like a wrecking ball to share his thoughts. From solo polyamorous parenting to fluid-bonding, these three climb up on the Swingset to riff. And riff they

SS 358: Pushing Your Edge – Personal Growth Through Sexual Adventure, Live at #Naughty2019

Dylan, Ginger, and Cooper presented in front of a live audience at Naughty in N'awlins 2019 about how sexual adventure impacts one's personal growth. Sharing stories, lessons they've learned, and strategies they've employed during their sexual adventuring, the Swingset crew invites you to explore your own personal growth. Pushing your edge and being curious about

IF 018: Intimacy Through Technology (and Sexy Storytime!)

Ginger and Ryan invite you onto the deck in the sunshine as they opine about one of their favorite sex positions! Eventually they get to talking about different apps, media, and technology that cultivate intimacy between the two of them and also among their whole polycule. One part saucy storytelling, one part tech discussion, and

SS 357: Swingset Origin Stories, Recorded Live at #Naughty2019!

Dylan, Ginger, and Cooper visited New Orleans for Naughty in N'awlins 2019! Among the the sexiness and debauchery, Naughty offers educational sessions and demonstrations, and spaces for panel discussions. in this episode, the Swingset crew relays their origin stories: Where they are, where they were, and how they got there. Tristan Taormino is coming to

SS 356: The New Swinger Experience!

We all start somewhere in the lifestyle and the Swingset is an ideal place to access that welcoming hand! Dylan and Ginger are joined by two wise, experienced, and fantastically fun couples: Diana and Keiland, party hosts from Dallas Texas, and Tori and Soul of the Torrid Souls podcast. This dynamic discussion covers practical topics

OTWC 036 – Strapping It On – On The Wet Coast

It's no secret that On The Wet Coast, we love our sex toys. Using those toys for strap-on sex is one of our favourite ways to engage with partners, or watch our partners engage with others. Though in some ways it is as simple as popping a dildo in a harness and getting to work,

IF 017: Getting Naughty!

In the first ever episode with guests, Ginger and Ryan are joined by Dr. Dave and Dylan in a bedcast from our trip to Naughty in N'awlins after a stellar dinner and then a creative round one of sexy time. All manner of New Orleans reflection including delicious food, drinks, and desserts parlay back into round two of sexy time for the evening. Prepare to find yourselves hot and bothered not only by the spicy conversation, but also the incidental pleasure sounds from the stage bed in that Naughty in N’awlins penthouse. While this episode may still be considered intellectual, it is heavy on the foreplay, sapiosexuals. Prepare yourselves accordingly.

SS 355: The BBW Experience, w/Carly and Ronda

Dylan and Ginger enjoy a conversation with Carly and Ronda about the Big, Beautiful Woman (BBW) experience. In a powerful and vulnerable discussion, Carly and Ronda share their journeys and the source of their personal power. As voluptuous, fat bitches, they generously share their strategies for everyone, especially the BBWs, to navigate the world with

OTWC 035 – Sexual Confidence – On The Wet Coast

We're always told that confidence is sexy, but how do we find the confidence to be our true sexual selves? How do we embrace our bodies and our kinks so we can enjoy the kinds of sex we desire? Finding the confidence in ourselves while living in a society that is all about tearing us

IF 016: Examining our Relationship(s)

Ginger and Ryan dig deep into their own relationship, as well as their current and past poly relationships, and explore what's worked for them and where they've fallen short. They call this process ‘holding up the mirror' for each other to reflect back to each other the real thoughts and emotions they've experienced in their own relationship, as well as with their poly partners. Ginger courageously owns her own past mistakes around “re-entry” from when Ryan had sexual experiences that didn't include her.

SS 354: LOTS x Sex Out Loud @ Pleasure Chest Chicago! (Part 2)

Tristan Taormino brings Sex Out Loud and Dylan, Ginger, and Cooper bring Life on the Swingset to the Pleasure Chest Chicago for a two hour chat and attendee Q&A about: Bisexual Male Acceptance Swinging and community Welcoming People, including Racially Diverse, people into the community White Supremacy, Fragility, Shame Spirals, and Erasure Single Men and

IF 015: Our Becoming and Truthtelling

Ginger and Ryan pickup from the story of his multiple strokes in Episode 14 and discuss how it's impacted their relationship and life perspectives. (Part 2 of 2)

IF 014: Back from the Edge

Ginger and Ryan (aka Prof) reveal the story of Prof’s multiple strokes and the myriad ways that this near death experience has shifted both their perspectives and impacted their relationship. (Part 1 of 2)

SS 353: LOTS x Sex Out Loud @ Pleasure Chest Chicago! (Part 1)

Tristan Taormino brings Sex Out Loud and Dylan, Ginger, and Cooper bring Life on the Swingset to the Pleasure Chest Chicago for a two hour chat and attendee Q&A about: Bisexual Acceptance Kink, including Tristan's stories from Twisted Tryst Single men at sexy and kink events How to find community ...and more! Would you like

OTWC 034 – Chosen Family – On The Wet Coast

Finding your people can be one of the most important things you do as you make your way in the world, and when you find them, it feels like coming home. Feels like family. Many of us have found a group or groups of people we consider to be family. Chosen family as opposed to

SS 352: Away With Our Partners!

Dylan Thomas and Ginger Bentham are both without their partners. Dylan and Ginger decide that it's more fun to cope with their traveling partners by dragging them kicking and streaming onto the Swingset! The Swingset welcomes back Tonia Thomas and Ryan, also known as... The Professor! Would you like 20% off on an award winning

SS 351: Parenting is F*cking Hard

Parenting is fucking hard... so Ginger Bentham, Lunabelle and Dylan Thomas get together to talk about it. They discuss working around child sitting, showing affection to partners, how open to be at various ages, and more. Would you like 20% off on an award winning line of restraints, sexual position devices, sex toys, and more?

OTWC 033 – Get Your Flirt On – On The Wet Coast

Figuring out how to express our interest in someone can be one of the most challenging things in dating, especially if we find them really attractive, fun, or interesting. What do we say? What if they're not into it? Why is it so hard to express ourselves in a fun, clear, non-creepy way? If what

MA 218: I've HALTed. Now What? – Multiamory

We had a good ranting session during recording the previous episode in regard to gender specific experiences when it comes to having arguments and yelling. We chat about how raising voices and expressing ones self differs by gender and how it is percieved can be gender specific as well. We compare how yelling is percieved

MA 217: Commitment in Non-Monogamy – Multiamory

Commitment is so often misunderstood when it comes to non-monogamy. We discuss definitions of commitment and identifying the traditional markers of commitment we've all grown up with. We realize that it can be difficult defining what it means exactly within the confines of non-monogamy as it doesn't necessarily fit the stereotypical mold (but that is


The Life on the Swingset crew, Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Mister Pent... and maybe even, could it really be, Cooper S. Beckett, get together and enjoy each other's company for the 350th episode of Life on the Swingset! Tristan Taormino is coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this

MA 216: What is Emotional Support? – Multiamory

So what exactly is emotional support. How do you ask for it? How do you go about learning what kind of emotional support that you need. What kind does your partner need? Even not knowing what kind of support you need in the moment and admitting it can go a long way! On this episode,

OTWC 032 – Sex Work Matters – On The Wet Coast

Since the passage of FOSTA/SESTA in the US, sexual content on the internet has been progressively quashed, starting with shutting down places sex workers could advertise but flowing forward until Tumblr was all but shuttered when they were no longer allowed to have sexual content. Various agencies drop the scare words ‘sex trafficking’ and the

SS 349: Ginger and Dylan Catch Up and Rediscover Themselves

Ginger Bentham and Dylan Thomas sit down together and catch up! They've had a lot of life happen in a very short amount of time. Ginger relays her experience in the desert, Dylan talks about moving through swinger spaces at takeovers and clubs, and they read and comment on lots of listener reviews! Tristan Taormino

MA 215: The Science of Jealousy – Multiamory

Jealousy happens in all types of relationships, but what is the science behind why we respond with jealousy to certain situations. What happens inside our bodies and minds in response things that make us feel jealousy. On this episode, we explore the scientific why behind jealousy and some ways to combat that internal struggle. If

MA 214: Ghosts of Normativity Past – Multiamory

Are you suffering from a Monogamy Hangover? We'll give you a dose of medicine to help cure what ails you. Many of us have been given a set of relationship expectations growing up and with changing those expectations, some pieces of those old beliefs and expectations are still left over. On this episode, we talk

SS 348: Sex Out Loud at Swingset Takes Desire 2018

Tristan Taormino hosts Sex Out Loud, LIVE, at Life on the Swingset Takes Desire 2018, in Cancún, with co-hosts Cooper S. Beckett and Ginger Bentham! Bradford and Angela are coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this 2019 for Life on the Swingset’s eighth trip to Desire! Visit

OTWC 031 – Libido & Desire – On The Wet Coast

Our desire for sexual experiences–both solo and with a partner or partners–fluctuates for countless reasons. Stress, fatigue, hormones, depression, body image, and connectivity are just a few of the things that can affect a person’s libido. Since we live in such a sex negative society talking about negative impacts on libido are considered frivolous since

SS 347: Squishing Off – Getting Experimental with our Genitals

Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, and Lunabelle of Ninja Sexology dive deep into the many ways genitals love stimulation and chat about being experimental with genitals. Lunabelle talks about Squishing Off, the Tantus Anaconda, and the Tantus Hoss. Bradford and Angela are coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this

MA 211: Thinking Critically about Sex Positivity and Sex Negativity – Multiamory

What does Sex Positivity and Sex Negativity actually mean? There is a lot of confusion surrounding these terms. People have a tendancy to throw these terms around with little to no explanation which just seems to add to the confusion. On this episode, we attempt to help define these two terms as best as we

MA 210: Take the Fight Out of Your Fights – Multiamory

Conflict is inevitable, but conflict can be productive. Everyone gets into fights and arguments but that doesn't mean your relationship is unhealthy or in trouble. On this episode, we talk about fighting fair instead of fighting dirty. Some of us fight with the misconception that we MUST win the fight to succeed. Sometimes we fight

SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 – Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

Tonight the Swingset opens the mailbag... but does so carefully, as it's -20F outside. Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Bex Caputo, and Lunabelle answer your listener questions! Question 1: My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. We have amazing sex, but I can't seem to get satisfied sexually. We have sex/oral sex at

MA 209: To Cohabitate or Not to Cohabitate, that IS the Question – Multiamory

Are you currently living together? Thinking about moving in? Why do you want to move in together? On this episode, we tackle some of the situations & questions that arise when cohabitation is on the table as well as statistics about living together for couples. We cover questions to ask yourself, actionable items to make

SS 345: Infinite Ways to Love and Play – A Nonmonogamy Panel

Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Lyndzi Miller, along with Kayla moderating, discuss nonmonogamy in a panel titled: Infinite Ways to Love and Play. This was recorded LIVE at the Tool Shed, An Erotic Boutique, in MIlwaukee, Wisconsin. Bradford and Angela are coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this

MA 208: Failure Is An Option – Multiamory

Failure is always an option, but it doesn't have to be the end of the world. We hear about failure quite a bit when it comes to schooling and even jobs/career but failure doesn't always get talked about in regard to relationships. It seems to be a dirty word when it comes to relationships because

MA 207: Self-Sabotage – Multiamory

Listen all ya'll, it's a sabotage! Okay this episode isn't really about the famous Beastie Boy song, it's about something much more serious. Self-Sabotage can be a vicious cycle. On this episode, we tackle self-Sabotage in relationships and in life. Procrastination, addiction, self-worth issues and so much more. We also provide some insight on how

OTWC 030 – Building Community – On The Wet Coast

If you're lucky, the place where you're living has a thriving sex -positive community and it takes little effort to find and take part in events such as meet-ups, workshops, and conventions. Most likely, that's not the case and either there isn't much of a community or the community that is there doesn't align with

MA 206: Attraction Perceptions & Misconceptions – Multiamory

What exactly IS attraction? How important is attraction? Why are we attracted to certain people or attributes? There are a lot of myths and misconceptions floating around out there. On this episode, we tackle what attraction is, how it affects who we choose as partners and even how attraction is related to sex drive. We

SS 344: Kira Royale and Mike – A Café Swingset Interview

Kira Royale and Mike joined us in 2018 for our trip to paradise, and when Dylan Thomas put the call out for interviews, they physically jumped at the opportunity. They discuss swinger spaces and what makes a space truly great, connecting with other people, and their experiences in the lifestyle. Join us in Paradise from

MA 205: Anger is Good for You – Multiamory

Anger is usually viewed as bad or something that should be stifled from a very young age. However, anger can be a force for good too! A lot of folks tend to repress their anger or express it in unhealthy ways. In this episode, we cover how to use your anger in a more positive

MA 204: Metamour Troubles & Struggles – Multiamory

What happens when you don't get along with your metamours? Or perhaps one of your metamours doesn't like you and you feel stuck in the middle. Today, we cover some of the struggles you might face in your polyamorous relationship(s). Things won't always go perfect, so we cover ways on how to properly deal with

BTB 142: 50 Shades of Crap – By the Bi

Welcome back, dear listener. Since we've started podcasting, we have had so so many people ask us what our thoughts are about the Fifty Shades of Grey movie. Recently, we FINALLY sat down with our notebooks to watch this movie. Oh wow... why did we agree to do this? If you HAVE seen the movie

SS 343: Total Desire Recall 2, Part 2!

JV Altharas, and Shara Bono once again join Cooper S. Beckett, Ginger Bentham, and Dylan Thomas to continue discussing the debauchery and delight that was... Life on the Swingset takes Desire 2018. Join us in Paradise from November 2-9, 2019 for Swingset Takes Desire 2019! We are already over 45% booked so get those early

SS 342: Polyamorous Authors and Representation, with Kevin Patterson and Alana Phelan

Authors of the new Paperback, For Hire: Operator, Alana Phelan and Kevin Patterson, join Dylan Thomas, Cooper S. Beckett, and Ginger Bentham to talk about being polyamorous authors and writing with an eye on representation and being true to ourselves. Join us in Paradise from November 2-9, 2019 for Swingset Takes Desire 2019! We are already

MA 203: Tackling Insecurities – Multiamory

Today we tackle insecurities. Insecurities tend to affect our relationships and ultimately overall our happiness. We open up and share some of our own personal insecurities that we are currently dealing with. But don't fret, we provide ways to alleviate those insecurities while still maintaining your sense of humility and not compromising boundaries. If you

BTB 141: Orgylicious – By the Bi

This episode is all about orgies! We being with talk about the health and safety aspects, play style conflicts, and some of the things we have learned from multiple orgies that we have experienced. In the second half, we tell some of our favorite recent orgy stories. Some of our experiences from MMMF to MFMFMF

OTWC 029 – Consent – On The Wet Coast

Consent is a topic that has been an essential part of the non-monogamy experience, though not everyone is great at asking for or respecting it, and some feel like we talk about enthusiastic consent too much. In monogamous dating, it has only recently become a more nuanced discussion than the No Means No message that

BTB 140: Live from Desire Riviera Maya! – By the Bi

Hello and welcome wonderful listeners. In this episode, we proudly present our first ever podcast recorded in front of a live audience. We recorded this midway through our week at Desire with the Life on the Swingset takeover and we had already had MANY firsts that we discuss. We sit with the Swingset crew and

SS 341: Total Desire Recall 2

Tristan Taormino, JV Altharas, and Shara Bono join Cooper S. Beckett, Ginger Bentham, and Dylan Thomas in reveling in the debauchery and delight that was... Life on the Swingset takes Desire 2018. Join us in Paradise from November 2-9, 2019 for Swingset Takes Desire 2019! We are already 30% booked so get those early bird

MA 202: Polyamorous Superhero Fiction – Multiamory

We speak to Kevin Patterson & Alana Phelan author's of For Hire: Operator. The book is an all encompassing love story and super hero novel all wrapped into one. 2 women of color with super human powers whose story touches on subjects on consent, polyamory, gender-non-conformity, safe sex practices, sex clubs and more! These super

BTB 139: Welcome to 20BiTeen!!! – By the Bi

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Welcome not to 2019 but to 20BiTeen!   In this episode, we interview the masterminds behind Bi+ Visibility, BiCONIC, and the #Bseen movement. We talk about each of these extremely important movements for the bisexual communities. We'll talk about the birth of these platforms and also the recent work we did with

SS 340 – Tay, Jay, Lara and Patrick – A Café Swingset Interview

Life on the Swingset takes Desire 2018 was a rousing and rejuvenating success. During the trip, Dylan put out a call: Would you like to be interviewed? If so, bug me! Patrick, Lara, Jay, and Tay answered immediately and couldn't wait to get on, so... pull up a seat in Café Swingset and listen in

BTB 138: The Swingers of Christmas Past, Present, and Future – By the Bi

Merry Christmas constant listener and new listeners alike! In this episode, we go on a Christmas Carolesque journey of our own swinger selves from the past, the present, and the future. We discuss how our styles have changed, what we look for in peoples/partners, and how we meet the folks that we play with. Thank

SS 339: Just the Three of Us – A Café Swingset Chat

Uneven, difficult, unique, surprising, evolving, exceptional. These are all words that describe Cooper's, Dylan's, and Ginger's lives on the Swingset.  Tonight they turn down the lights, sit across the table, and chat... "Just the three of us." Join us in Paradise from November 2-9, 2019 for Swingset Takes Desire 2019! We are already 30% booked

BTB 137: Desire Resort Full Recap (Part 2) – By the Bi

We have had so many questions about our recent trip to The Desire Resorts in Cancun Mexico and we were trying to decide the best way to answer them all, so we asked The Gentleman to come over and interview us about the experiences. We've split the interview into two episodes. In this one, the

MA 201: Are you ready to be polyamorous? – Multiamory

Is anyone really ever ready? This week we delve into the different signs that determine if you are ready to become polyamorous…or not. We talk about personal attributes that are helpful to have when beginning a new relationship style, red flags to watch out for when you are starting out, and our own personal experiences

OTWC 028 – Have You Met Flick? – On The Wet Coast

We're doing something a little different on this episode. Many of you know a whole lot about Kat Stark thanks to their blog posts and book Yelling In Pasties: The Wet Coast Confessions of an Anxious Slut. Their co-host, co-conspirator, and true love is more of a mystery since he doesn't blurt his shit all

BTB 136: Desire Resort Full Recap (Part 1) – By the Bi

We have had so many questions about our recent trip to The Desire Resorts in Cancun Mexico and we were trying to decide the best way to answer them all, so we asked The Gentleman to come over and interview us about the experiences. We've split the interview into two episodes. In this one, the

MA 200: 200 Epsiodes Later – Multiamory

It's Multiamory's milestone 200th episode! We take part in a veritable retrospective hootenanny – sharing which tools, research, and lessons from creating the show that have had the most long lasting effects on our relationships and ourselves. Turns out that talking about sex, relationships, and communication every week for 200 weeks has some interesting outcomes!

BTB 135: Passion, Pendulum, and Parties – By the Bi

In this episode, we take you to Passion in Paradise in FNQ. We talk about the experiences that we had at PiP including the 2 classes we presented (blow jobs and cock massage & nuru massage). Next, we talk about our most recent Pendulum Party (Number 7 for those keeping count!) and it was definitely

SS 338: My Dinner With Swingset in Paradise – A Dinnercast

Join Cooper S. Beckett, Ginger Bentham, and Dylan Thomas, and Ophilia Tesla, The Professor, and Antonia Thomas, as they chat for nearly two hours over dinner at Sahlo, a restaurant at Desire Riviera Maya. We're thrilled to announce that we are ALREADY BOOKING for 2019's Desire trip! Join us from November 2nd through the 9th, 2019 for Life

MA 199: Visibility and Worthiness with Kat Blaque – Multiamory

This week we're joined by transgender rights activist and YouTube sensation Kat Blaque. We talk about outness and visibility, handling criticism and backlash online, worthiness in relationships, and navigating polyamorous dating while trans and black. You can find Kat's youtube channel at and her new blog on polyamory at If you want to

SS 337: Relationship Struggles: Emotional Black Holes

Relationships are often worth the effort. People are worth the effort... until they're not. Tonight, Bex Caputo and Lunabelle join Dylan Thomas and Ginger Bentham to discuss when the people we like stop putting in the effort to be with us, and when the effort we send their way feels like it falls into a

BTB 134: Desire Resort Comparison – By the Bi

Having had the luxury of spending back to back weeks at Desire Riviera Maya and Desire Pearl in Mexico we thought we would do a direct side by side comparison of the two resorts. We try as best as our brains can to remember every up and down of both locations. Note, that this is

MA 198: Supporting a Partner through Loss – Multiamory

We all experience loss – the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, being let go from a job. This week we discuss helping a partner through grief, how to care for yourself while you're caring for someone else, and also the particular challenges non-monogamous relationships present when coping with loss. If

BTB 132: Bad Flirts & Bad Dates (Recorded at PiP) – By the Bi

Whilst at Passion in Paradise in Far North Queensland, we asked folks to sit down and chat with us to rate their flirting skills and then to tell us their worst swinger fails. Boy were we surprised by what folks had to offer... We have tales of people abusing family heirlooms to folks who claim

MA 197: HIV with Liz Sutherland – Multiamory

For many people. the very topic of HIV is quite scary, but not so for our guest this week, Liz Sutherland of Positive Life New South Wales. We chat with Liz about the vast wealth of information that most of us don't know about HIV. including how it's epidemiology is changing, effective methods for treatment

OTWC 027: Jealousy Revisited – On The Wet Coast

Jealousy is a complex emotion that usually arises when we feel threatened or like we're not getting our needs met. It is almost always the reason people cite when they state that they couldn't ever be non-monogamous yet plenty of non-monogamous and polyamorous people experience jealousy regularly. The various circumstances that lead to jealousy tend

SS 336: The Swingset Takes Desire – Year Seven Live!

Much as the Harry Potter series did when they reached Year Seven, we go long, overstuffed, earnest, and sometimes brash. Our annual trip to Desire Resort Riviera Maya is here, and Cooper S. Beckett, Ginger Bentham, and Dylan Thomas sat down with a wonderful group of Swingsetters in the courtyard of the resort to podcast live! We also give

BTB 131: Swingcations (Planning & Pitfalls) – By the Bi

In this episode we've gotten The Gentleman back (by very popular demand) to sit with us and talk about planning a swingcation with play partners. We discuss what goes into selecting a location, timing, who to go with, and what to do. You'll get the whens, the wheres, the whys, and the hows of putting

MA 196: Am I Still Polyamorous If… – Multiamory

Fortunately, there's no Polyamory Board of Directors who decides who makes the cut or not. However, that doesn't prevent many people from worrying about whether or not they can claim a polyamorous identity. On this episode, we discuss identity, gatekeeping, and common questions that we get: “Am I still polyamorous if I still feel jealousy?”

BTB 130: Return of the Bisexual Last Crusade – By the Bi

This week we finish our multi-part deep dive series dissecting Bisexuality. As you may recall, a few months ago we had a listener send us a series of research papers regarding bisexual peoples. We dug through those papers and are attempting to give you an overview of all of the amazing scientific information inside. This

MA 195: Wellbeing and Online Dating – Multiamory

Online dating presents a wealth of opportunities to connect with like-minded people, but it also introduces the potential for endless frustration. If you're feeling discouraged from rejection, confused about how to write a good profile, or just plain burnt out from the whole process, check out our tips for maintaining your mental health and emotional

BTB 129: TaBOO Fetishes A – Z – By the Bi

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!! BOO!!!Do you ever think about what scares you... sexually? In this special extended episode, we aim to push boundaries and limits in a safe and secure space. We go through a whole list of fetishes and discuss our thoughts and experiences with them! We want to note that we do not intend to

MA 194: Recovering from Infidelity – Multiamory

We get a lot of questions related to infidelity: can you even “cheat” when you're consensually non-monogamous? If my partner cheats on me, should we transition into an open relationship in order to stay together? Is it possible to heal a relationship after infidelity? Tune in for the answers to these questions, as well as

SS 335: Blowjobs²

Who doesn't love talking about blow-jobs? Bex Caputo from the Dildorks Podcast rejoins Dylan Thomas, Cooper S. Beckett, and Ginger Bentham to continue on for a whole new episode, doing a deeper dive into giving and receiving blowjobs, cock-worship, and dildos. Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live

SEAGG 038: The Fuck SESTA/FOSTA Episode – Sex Ed A Go-Go

Consultant in sexual health for the UN and free Union Square Park sex advisor, Francisco Ramirez, and online Domme and burlesque performer, Lulu Kramer, join Lola onstage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on March 31st, 2018 for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     On this episode of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola and

BTB 128: Pet Play – By the Bi

Hello again!!! In this episode, we brought The Gentleman back to discuss Pet Play. In the not too distant past, he came over to play and Mr. Atom was in full puppy mode. We talk with him about the mindset of puppy play, the actions involved, and exactly about what he thought about the evening.

MA 193: Making Long Distance Relationships Work – Multiamory

Long distance relationships are pretty common in non-monogamous communities, and they are becoming even easier to maintain with modern technology. This week, we share the latest statistics on on the success of long distance relationships as well as fundamental practices to keep your LDR running smooth. If you want to support our show, the best

SS 334: Gettin' Some While on the Road!

One of the difficulties of being in a community like non-monogamy is that your people are spread all over the country and the world. Often we travel to travel to see them, and sometimes when traveling for other reasons, it's nice to send up the beacon and see who answers. Join Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham,

MA 192: Self-Esteem Boost – Multiamory

Forget participation trophies! This week we're talking about self-esteem. We all have our highs and lows, but did you know that having greater self-esteem is associated with better health and a better social life? We'll talk about the easiest ways to get a lasting self-esteem boost, whether it's possible to have self-esteem that's too high,

BTB 127: Pre-Vacation or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Swingcations – By the Bi

ZOMG!!!!! Tomorrow we go on VaCaTiOn!!!! We are off to Passion in Paradise before going off to Desire Mexico. In this podcast, we talk about how to properly prepare to go on a swinger vacation. We discuss the planning that we did for the sexy theme nights and the calmer days. Should you get there

BTB 126: Another Deep Dive into Bisexuality – By the Bi

We start this week with an amazing date that we had with a very sexy couple. A couple we both thought were way out of our league. (Spoiler alert: We were apparently wrong!) Also this week we continue our multi-part deep dive series dissecting Bisexuality. As you may recall, a few months ago we had

OTWC 026: Sex, Geeks, and Sexy Geekery – On The Wet Coast

Geekery & non-monogamy crossover in so many ways. So many of the people we've met, connected with, and sexed up have been fellow geeks that enjoy much of the same pop culture that we do, whether it's movies, tv shows, books, musical theatre, roleplaying games, or video games. You need to have something to talk

BTB 125: Hey Yeah Yeah Yeah, What's Going on? – By the Bi

In this episode, we catch up on some of the things we've done recently, including a discussion over the recent "Club V", a wedding, and a few of our dates and such. We also go through some listener questions that have come across our desks recently. Find us on social media!!! On Twitter @BytheBiPodcast On Facebook @BytheBiPodcast

SS 333: Giving and Receiving Amazing Blowjobs

Tonight Bex Caputo from The Dildorks podcast joins Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, and Ginger Bentham to talk about giving and receiving amazing blowjobs. The crew offers tips, tricks, recount personal techniques, and more! Bex mentions that his favorite dildo is the Vixskin Gambler... a truly impressive dildo. Tristan Taormino’s #AllIn for Desire… are you?

MA 191: Toxic Relationships – Multiamory

Are your relationships a dumping ground for toxic waste? This week we talk about the hallmarks of toxicity in relationships. Whether you've got a toxic metamour, romantic partner, co-worker, or friend, tune in to learn how to recognize the signs and break free. If you want to support our show, the best way is to

BTB 124: A Deep Dive into Bisexuality- By the Bi

This week we start a multi-part deep dive series dissecting Bisexuality. A few months ago we had a listener send us a series of research papers regarding bisexual peoples. We dug through those papers and are attempting to give you an overview of all of the amazing scientific information inside. This week, in part one,

MA 190: Surviving and Thriving in NRE – Multiamory

Do you feel like you can do anything? Are your palms sweaty and your stomach butterfly…ish? You may be feeling New Relationship Energy (NRE). This week we talk about the chemical overload your brain gives you when you're first falling in love, as well as strategies to stay grounded and care for other relationships even

MA 189: Handling Backlash – Multiamory

When you start talking to people about non-traditional relationships, the reaction isn't always pretty. This week dicuss what motivates negative reactions to non-monogamy, as well as practical tips for handling the haters and rocking tough conversations with grace and ease. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one of

SS 332: Revisiting Soft Swap & Full Swap – Styles of Swinging

Fin and Emma from the Normalizing Non-Monogamy podcast join Cooper, Dylan, Chris, and Lola to revisit Soft Swap vs. Full Swap and connect on why there's still a useful distinction to make... and why that distinction is only so useful. Tristan Taormino’s #AllIn for Desire… are you? Join us from November 3rd through the 10th

MA 188: What Hierarchy Means to Me – Multiamory

Some people think polyamory can only function with a primary-secondary hierarchy. Others think it's a recipe for disaster. On this episode, we want to dive into the nuances of hierarchy — how it has affected our lives personally, when it's been beneficial, and when it's been painful. If you want to support our show, the

OTWC 025: Kinky Communication – On The Wet Coast

Sex, particularly kinky sex, is still a taboo subject in our sex negative culture. We're not supposed to talk about it so we don't learn good communication skills around it. It's one of those things that is supposed to just kinda happen. We hang onto a lot of the messages we got about sex growing

SEAGG 037: The Sexual Healing Episode ─ Sex Ed A Go-Go

The trembling flower of submission and BDSM educator, Mollena Williams-Haas, and the beast of burlesque and sex worker rights advocate, Motherfuckin Akynos, join Lola onstage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on October 28th, 2017 for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     On this episode of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola and the crew

MA 187: Break Free of Relationship Drama – Multiamory

No one wants a relationship full of drama…or do they? Turns out there are specific roles that many of us actually enjoy to play in any given “drama” situation. This week we talk about how to break the cycle and transform drama into empowerment. If you want to support our show, the best way is

MA 186: Reconnecting When You Don't Want To – Multiamory

Have you ever tensed up when a partner tried to hug you after a fight? What about feeling weird when a partner comes home from a date with someone else? This week we're talking about the best ways to reconnect with a partner after a physical or emotional separation, even when it doesn't feel easy.

MA 185: Can Men Get Along with their Metamours? – Multiamory

On this episode we speak with Dr. Alex Bove about the findings of his recently published research on metamours and masculinity, titled: “Meta, More or Less? A Phenomenological Study of Polyamorous Men’s Relationships with Their Male Metamours.” Tune in to find out more about the three phases of the metamour relationship, as well as the

SS 331: Swinging and Polyamory when Broke AF

A lot of the people are pretty broke, though most are willing to add the caveat of privilege being able to basic niceties and even engage in a little treat every once in a while. Some of the trappings that go along with swinging and polyamory, namely the frequent outings, overnight stays at hotels and

MA 184: Multiamory Answers Your Questions Vol. 3 (Live from Lake Tahoe) – Multiamory

This week we're coming at ya live from our first ever patreon retreat in Lake Tahoe, CA! We answer questions from our Patreon supporters, discussing how to avoid scarcity mindset, preventing burnout, fostering inclusivity, Emily's goddess voice, and more! If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one of our

SS 330: Gang Bang the Mailbag 37 – Pet Play, Wallflowers, Canadian Clubs

Tonight's Gang Bang the Mailbag is the crew's 37th, and they're doing it in force! Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Dirty Lola, Mister Pent, and Dr. Liz Powell get together to answer your questions! You can send them questions to answer by calling 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464) or sending them an email! Question 1: I have

OTWC 024: More/Better Sex – On The Wet Coast

Click-baity title aside, many people would like to figure out how to get more sex and better sex in their lives. It's not a priority for everyone, and isn't required to be, but for those who are looking to get more sex in their lives, it can be a struggle. We're here to tell you

SEAGG 036: The Cherry Poppin Show – Sex Ed A Go-Go

Expert bra fitter and body positive media content creator, Kimmay Caldwell, and the human tornado of burlesque and Switch and Play Drag collective member, Divina Gransparkle, joined Lola onstage for the first time at Otto’s Shrunken Head on September 30th, 2017 for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     On this episode of

MA 183: Equal and Equitable Relationships – Multiamory

What does it mean to have a relationship that feels “equal”? Is it a fair division of labor? Mutual trust and respect? Treating every partner exactly the same? This week we dive in to equal and inequal relationships, as well as how the concept of equity can help to bring balance to your love life.

MA 182: Gamify Your Life – Multiamory

If you've listened to this podcast for a while, you're aware that the Multiamory crew are a bunch of gaming nerds. This week, we dive into the principles and psychology behind gamification, as well as how you can gamify your way to self-improvement and better relationships. If you want to support our show, the best

SS 329: The Importance of Play, with Angelique Luna, Live at Poly Dallas Millennium!

Cooper S. Beckett and Dylan Thomas travel to Dallas for PolyDallas Millennium! There, they join with Angelique Luna (of the Living a Sex Positive Life podcast) to discuss the importance of play, especially during times of struggle. Do you have a sex positive project? Would you be interested in a grant? Visiting the Effing Foundation

MA 181: Kim Tallbear – Multiamory

We're extra excited to speak to Professor Kim Tallbear. Dr. Tallbear is the author of The Critical Polyamorist blog, as well as several books, articles, and talks on settler sexuality, Indigenous peoples, technology, and relationships. We dig into the details of what settler sexuality is, how it influences our relationships, and the many different ways

SS 328: Getting Back on the Horse

In an episode recorded September 22nd, 2017, Dr. Liz Powell, Dylan Thomas, and Mike Joseph get together to talk about getting back on the horse after loss, or anything else that may have taken them out of dating and playing with people for an extended period of time. Dylan almost didn't release this episode, but

MA 180: The Mono/Poly Paradox – Multiamory

It's a questions we've gotten since starting the podcast — can mono/poly relationships work? We're joined by Phoebe Phillips, author of the Polyammering blog and creator of the “Monocorn Sanctuary” group on Facebook. Phi shares her own experience as the mono side of a long-term polyamorous relationship as well as her guidance for people considering

MA 179: Anxiety and Relationships – Multiamory

Anxiety can rear its head in the form of some weird gut feelings or nervousness, or it can be a full blown panic attack. This week we talk about the full spectrum of how anxiety and anxiety disorders show up in our relationships, how to cope with them, and how to comfort a partner who

OTWC 023: Dating During Upheaval – On The Wet Coast

Ideally, when we’re meeting, dating, and sexing on people we want to be our best selves. We want to be feeling stable and settled and able to be present and focused for all the newness that might be coming our way. Unfortunately, circumstances are almost never ideal. Life constantly hits us with the unexpected–job loss,

MA 178: The Basics of Boundaries – Multiamory

Let's look at the fundamentals of boundaries. Boundaries are one of the most powerful and important tools for having healthy relationships, but it’s one that is often misunderstood and misused. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one of our patrons at In addition to helping us continue to

MA 177: This is Your Brain on Love – Multiamory

This is your brain. And this is your brain on love. We’re talking about your brain on relationships — how the different parts of your brain affect how we relate to our partners, and how we can use that to build better relationships. This week's episode was inspired in part by Wired for Love by

MA 176: Christianity and Polyamory – Multiamory

“Peace be with you! This week we're sitting down with Rev. Austin Adkinson and theologian J.D. Mechelke to dive into the tricky topic of polyamory and Christianity. How is the Christian church handling shifting values around sexuality and non-traditional relationships? What about the church's bad track record with sex positivity? And what the heck is

SS 327: Being Sex Positive in a Sex Negative World – A Panel Discussion at Camp Ravish

This week on The Swingset, we return to the scorching 107 degree heat of Austin, Texas, where Ginger and Cooper attended and presented at Camp Ravish. On the last day of Camp, they sat down with several other presenters there, including The Two Knotty Boys, Melissa Jones, Bella LaVey, Rihannon Ixchel, and Miss O Kissed,

MA 175: Adventures in Online Arguments – Multiamory

The Internet: making you get in fights with strangers since the 90s! This week we dive into online arguments: how they happen, how to avoid them, and how to most effectively communicate when you find yourself in the thick of it. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one

OTWC 022: Flirting, Sexting, and Dirty Talk – On The Wet Coast

Nearly everyone we know claims to be bad at flirting, the two of us included, but somehow many of us are scoring dates and getting laid. How do we get over our own brains to send that first message or turn a chat into something sexy and sassy? And once we're in a sexy space,

SS 326: Coloring Outside the Lines in Sexuality & Kink – Cooper & Ginger Live at Camp Ravish, Austin

This past weekend, Cooper S. Beckett and Ginger Bentham flew down to the balmy state of Texas, which greeted them with a 107 degree heat index. But the temperature wasn't the only thing that was hot that weekend because they were in town for Camp Ravish just outside of Austin - three days and two

MA 174: Numerous Non-Binary Identities (with therapist Dara Hoffman-Fox) – Multiamory

Author and gender therapist Dara Hoffman-Fox joins us once again to talk about gender, identity, and the full spectrum that lies outside the traditional binary. We discuss terminology, misconceptions, and the important journey of discovering one's self identity. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one of our patrons

SS 325: Gang Bang the Mailbag 36 – Swinging while Broken, Addiction and Swinger Culture, and More!

The Swingset crew is back with another Gang Bang the Mailbag! Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Dr. Liz Powell, Dirty Lola, and Mister Pent answer listener voicemails and emails! Voicemailbag Question #1 Summary How can my husband better navigate swinger culture after coming clean from an alcohol addiction? Voicemailbag Question #2 Summary How can I

MA 173: Transitioning Relationships – Multiamory

Can you stay close with an ex after a breakup? Multiamory proves that it is possible! In this episode, Jase and Emily explore the subtle nuances of transitioning your relationship from romantic to platonic, the necessary time it takes to transition, and how sometimes it isn't always worth it to try to stay in each

SS 324: From Poo to Lactation – A Swingset Business Episode

The Swingset crew banked so many episodes that they hadn't recorded for almost two months. For their first night back, they decided to give each other... the business. In addition to talking about tall skinny dudes with big dicks and fisting, they end up discussing poop... a lot. They also talk about lactation, breeding fantasy,

MA 172: Polyamory in Movies and TV (Live Show) – Multiamory

In this live show episode from our 2018 tour, we're surveying how pop culture has treated polyamory and other non-monogamous relationships in the past year. We look at clips from She's Gotta Have It, Professor Marston & the Wonder Women, Steven Universe, and many more. For the full experience, be sure to check out this

SS 323: Gang Bang The Mailbag 35: Dental Dams, Straight Women, Aspergers & Swinging

Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, and Ginger Bentham know that the mailbag won't gang bang itself, so they've sat down to answer listener submitted questions for the 35th time! Question 1: Great podcast, I enjoy listening to you guys. My boyfriend and I are in an open relationship and it is going very well. My

MA 171: Polyamory, Family, and Children (with Dr. Eli Sheff) – Multiamory

We're pleased to have Dr. Eli Sheff back on the show to talk about her 15+ years of research into polyamorous families with children. Sheff shares the shifting trends she has seen over the course of her study as well as some practical tips for polyamorous people looking to cohabit or raise children with multiple

SEAGG 035: The So Much Pride Show – Sex Ed A. Go-Go

Sex educator of “Bex Talks Sex”, Bex Caputo, and go-go dancer and stage kitten, Vera Safire, join Lola onstage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on June 24th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     On this special episode of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola and the crew celebrate NYC Pride. The Pussy Posse

SS 322: They Came For the Titties, They Stayed For the Knowledge – A Playground Bedcast

The Life on the Swingset crew traveled to Playground 2018: Come Together, and decided to sit together and record one of our traditional "Swingset Bedcast" episodes. Cooper S. Beckett, Ginger Bentham, Dylan Thomas, Dirty Lola, Dr. Liz Powell, Mike Joseph, and Chris Pent sat on two beds, close enough to sweat on, spit on, and

MA 170: Taking for Your Pleasure (with Melissa Mango and Cosmo Meens) – Multiamory

Multiamory made some new friends at RelateCon! We sit down with Cosmo Meens and Melissa Mango to discuss their work in consent, pleasure-based touching, and how objectifying your partner can actually be really, really sexy. You can find more of their work at and at If you want to support our show, the

MA 169: Unapolygetic – Multiamory

This week we’re talking about how to be open, honest, and unafraid when talking to other people about your relationships, whether they are someone you are dating, a new acquaintance, or an old friend. — a little something that we call being unapolygetic. Check out Dara Hoffman-Fox's worksheet for coming out here: If you

SS 321: On the Power of Touch… and on Touch Deficits

Touch is powerful. Touch signals and communicates, touch comforts and supports, Touch can be thoughtful...touch can hurt. We feel it when we have it, we feel its absence when we don't, and sometimes we do things that result in us not getting enough of it. Tonight, Dylan Thomas, Dirty Lola, Dr. Liz Powell, and Mike

MA 168: Communication Hacks: Booster Pack – Multiamory

We’re opening our Communication Hacks: Booster Pack! The Multiamory crew walks each other through a communication tip that we recently discovered and thought was super awesome. Learn how switch-tracking, bids, and micro scripts can take your relationship communication to the next level. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become

OTWC 021: Non-Monogamy and SCIENCE! – On The Wet Coast

Endless amounts of research has been done on the topic of love and relationships – generally focused on the heteronormative pair bonding that is the norm in our western culture. A few books such as Sex at Dawn and Mating in Captivity have been the go to tomes for the non-monogamous looking for science that

SS 320: Diversity in Sexuality Conferences and Sex Therapy with Ruby Bouie Johnson of PolyDallas Millennium

A fair critique of most sex positive gatherings, especially sexuality conferences, is that they are predominantly white. Over the years, significant progress has been made, and PolyDallas Millennium this July 13-15 is on the forefront of programming diversity and encouraging wider ranges of voices. Tonight Ruby Bouie Johnson joins Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Dirty

MA 167: Polyamory and the Law – Multiamory

On this episode of the Multiamory podcast we’re at the first annual Southwest Love Fest in Tucson, Arizona speaking with lawyer Jonathan Lane, who specializes in family and immigration law for the polyamorous, kinky, and LGBTQ communities If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one of our patrons at

MA 166: Impromptu Bible Study – Multiamory

What's the Bible have to say about polyamory? Spoiler alert: it mostly has things to say about questionable polygamy. Join us for an impromptu study on multi-partner relationships and Judeo-Christian values. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one of our patrons at In addition to helping us continue

SS 319: Total Desire Recall with Tristan Taormino, JV Altharas, and Shara Bono

Every November for the last six year, the Life on the Swingset has led a motley crew of wayward hedonists to Desire Resort on the Riviera Maya in Cancun. Tonight the hosts of our 2017 takeover, Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, JV Altharas, Shara Bono, and Tristan Taormino, talk about that trip; what

MA 165: Polyamory Finishing School – Multiamory

“Pinky out! We’re going to polyamory finishing school! Connecting with a polyamorous community is an important first step on someone’s journey so we’re covering the things that will give you a huge advantage at your first meetup. Come learn how to ensure you’ll have the best possible time and set yourself up for success. ”

MA 164: The Relationship Escalator & Solo Polyamory (with author Amy Gahran – Multiamory

We get to pick the brain of Amy Gahran a.k.a. Aggie Sez about her book, Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator. We explore the social norms for how most people assume intimate relationships are supposed to work, as well as the many ways that people are stepping off the relationship escalator to live and love on

SS 318: The Art of the Compliment

Dylan Thomas, Dirty Lola, and Dr. Liz Powell sit down together to talk about the art of the compliment: how to compliment someone in a way that it will be accepted in the spirit it's given, how to compliment someone without a goal, and how to treat compliments as small gifts that require no reciprocation.

MA 163: Inspiring Relationships – Part 2 – Multiamory

Can you think of any relationships that inspire you? Perplexed by this question, the Multiamory crew investigates what truly makes for healthy, stable, and inspiring relationships, inspired by the research and writings of Esther Perel. Be sure to check out part 1 first! If you want to support our show, the best way is to

SS 317: The Polyamorous Furry Community w/ Viro the Science Collie & Metriko Oni

There's a community that Life on the Swingset hasn't found occasion to speak with much: the polyamorous furry community. Tonight, Dylan Thomas, Dr. Liz Powell, and Mike Joseph invite Metriko Oni and Viro the Science Collie, of the Feral Attraction podcast, to talk about the fandom and to how we can find more common ground

MA 162: Inspiring Relationships – Part 1 – Multiamory

Can you think of any relationships that inspire you? Perplexed by this question, the Multiamory crew investigates what truly makes for healthy, stable, and inspiring relationships, inspired by the research and writings of Esther Perel, Simone de Beauvoir, and Mark Manson. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become one

OTWC 020: Attraction – On The Wet Coast

Attraction is a mysterious thing. There are physical and personality characteristics in people we're almost always attracted to: perhaps a certain body type or sense of humour. Other times it can be harder to nail down why a certain person hits all the yes buttons for you, or what makes us override our usual “dealbreakers”.

MA 161: Love is Not Colorblind with Kevin Patterson – Multiamory

This week we're talking with Kevin Patterson, creator of the Poly Role Models blog and author of the upcoming book Love Is Not Colorblind: Race and Representation in Polyamorous and Other Alternative Communities. If you're interested in creating a polyamory discussion group, meet-up, or other inclusive event, this is required reading! You can find more

SEAGG 034: The Playground LIVE Show – Sex Ed A. Go-Go

Sex educators Luna Matatas of Peg the Patriarchy fame and Taylor J. Mace of Feisty Fox Films and burlesque performer / producer, Zyra Lee Vanity, join Lola onstage at the Playground Conference on February 24th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     This episode was so good that it skipped the line

SS 316: Shiny Beacons of Slutty Hope – Live at Playground Conference 2018 in Toronto, Canada!

Life on the Swingset came together for Playground 2018: Come Together, a Sex-Positive, Inclusive, Intersectional Event. It was the largest gathering of Swingset co-hosts ever, and the first such gathering of all co-hosts since 2015! Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Dirty Lola, Dr. Liz Powell, Mike Joseph, and Chris Pent sat in front

MA 160: Find Your Biases, Have Better Relationships – Multiamory

Get ready to question reality! This week we cover the fundamentals of biased thinking, some common ways that it can show up in your relationships, and how you can get around them in order to have happier and healthier connections to your partners and to yourself. If you want to support our show, the best

SS 315: Letting Your Kinks Run Wild with Sunny Megatron & Ken Melvoin-Berg

Paths to kink vary pretty wildly. From occasional giggles and smacks on the bottom, to role-playing as students in a classroom begging to be good for the principal, to full suspensions in front of hundreds of people, following our minds and bodies can lead us places we never thought we could go. Tonight, Sunny Megatron

MA 159: The Triforce of Communication: DLC Expansion Pack – Multiamory

The Triforce of Communication is back! This is yet another one of our favorite communication tools, and this week we're revisiting it with much more knowledge and experience using it in our daily lives. Learn how to get what you want in conversations with your partner, and how to avoid common miscommunication pitfalls with this

MA 158: Beyond Blue and Pink – Multiamory

The Multiamory crew loves talking about gender, so we' were both excited and intimidated by tackling such a broad topic this week. Gender identity and expression has come into mainstream conversation, and in this episode we're tackling the basics of everything you need to know: language, avoiding bias and stereotypes, and how gender effects your

OTWC 019: Building Your Ideal Relationship – On The Wet Coast

Many of us in non-monogamy land started out in monogamous relationships. Not necessarily because those were right for us, but because they were the default. We didn’t even know that there were other relationship options. Once we start exploring ethical non-monogamy we discover countless variations on the big 3: SwInger, Open, Polyamory. Some people have

SS 314: How to Make Hot Kinky Play Actually Happen w/ Marcia Baczynski & Midori

Tonight, guests Midori and Marcia Baczynski join Cooper Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Dr. Liz Powell, and Dirty Lola to talk about making hot kinky play actually happen. They'll also discuss the Wanted Man Intensive course to help good guys work on becoming better guys. Marcia B's Resources: Marcia's Site:   Midori's Resources: Protip! Questions You

MA 157: Disability After Dark with Andrew Gurza – Multiamory

This week we had the pleasure of talking to “Disability After Dark” podcast host Andrew Gurza! Andrew gave us an amazingly funny and candid interview on the 101 of sex and disability and dove into some deeper topics regarding language, intersectionality and his Huffington Post Article, “4 things you should never say to a Queer

SS 313: Mutual Masturbation – Giving Each Other a Hand

One of Life on the Swingset's most popular episodes is Masturbation - Our Touching Origins. Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Dirty Lola, Dr. Liz Powell, and Mister Pent sit together to talk about handing the job off, as it were. Whether masturbating in front of another person or playing with them while they play with

MA 156: How To Get Over Your Ex – Multiamory

Break-ups may sting, but it’s the healing process afterwards that can truly hurt for a long time. It’s especially difficult if you find yourself still thinking about your ex-partner and plagued with questions: Should I try to win her back? Where did we go wrong? Why can’t I just forget about it? This week, we

SS 312: Sexually Relevant Grooming Habits

Nail Clipping! Facial, Genital, and Ass Hair Maintenance! Keeping it Clean... or Not! Tonight, Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Dr. Liz Powell, Dirty Lola,  and Mister Pent discuss sexually relevant grooming habits, and why we do, or don't participate in them! Join Dylan, Cooper, Dr. Liz, Mister Pent, Dirty Lola, and Mike Joseph at Playground 2018!   You can support us

MA 155: How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Multiamory

Trust in a relationship — easy to lose, difficult to regain. If there's been a major breach of trust in your relationship, is there any hope that it could be rebuilt? This week, we discuss the many different ways that trust can look, and what to expect if you and your partner are trying to

MA 154: Getting Real about Sexual Health – Multiamory

How many people would you need to have unprotected sex with in order to catch an STI? 4? 50? 1000? This week we get real about the language we use around sexual health as well as your real-world chances of catching an STI (hint: you probably already have one.) If you want to support our

OTWC 018: Fantasies – On The Wet Coast

Fantasizing is big part of most healthy sex lives. We fantasize about things we’d like to have done to us and/or what we’d like to do to others. We also fantasize about things that scare, horrify, or even kind of (or completely) disgust us. All these things are part of healthy sexual brain activity. “Is

MA 153: Building Consent Culture (with author Kitty Stryker) – Multiamory

We are so pleased to be speaking with Kitty Stryker — feminist writer, queer activist, and author of Ask: Building Consent Culture. In this episode we talk about how consent affects our lives outside the bedroom as well as the difficult task of holding space for people who have been called out on boundary violations.

SS 311: Foresight and Hindsight (Amber) – Goodbye 2017, Hello 2018

It's been a year, hasn't it? On this episode of Life on the Swingset, The Podcast, we're going to reflect, not on the horrors of the year that everybody among us so well knows, but what this year specifically has shown us, in our sexuality, in our interpersonal interactions, in our lifestyles, and then we'll

MA 152: Polyamory: The Most Common Questions – Multiamory

In this episode, we're getting back to our roots! The Multiamory crew was interviewed about the basics of polyamory and our personal experiences for a radio project. If you're a polyamory beginner, or if you need some inspiration for answering all the questions your family and friends are throwing at you, check out this episode.

SS 310: Aging and Sexuality with Ken Haslam, Belle Sheperd, Joel Kann, and Duncan – Recorded Live at Desire Resort

Those of us young in the world and in non-monogamy don't spend a lot of time thinking about aging and in how it affects our play partners, our relationships, and our own sexuality as we progress. During Life on the Swingset's takeover of Desire Resort, Dylan Thomas sat down with Belle Shepherd, Joel Kann, Ken

MA 151: Conflict Crash Course – Multiamory

Conflict and disagreements are unavoidable in relationships, but they don't have to cause pain, negativity, or destruction. In this episode we cover a collection of tools to use before, after, and during fights you have with your partner in order to find constructive resolution and reconnection. If you want to support our show, the best

SEAGG 033: The Poly Revolution Show – Sex Ed A Go-Go

Freelance writer and cohost of podcast “The Jheri Curl Chronicles”, Mike Joseph, and the tiny dancer of burlesque and creator of YouTube series “Superboob”, Tiny D, join Lola onstage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on May 27th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     On this episode of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola

SS 309: The Most Valuable Sexual Lessons We Ever Learned

Nearly everything of value Cooper learned about sex was learned after opening up. He's unashamed to admit, his sex was thoroughly mediocre. Thankfully, he met many people who were much better at sex and he studied at their feet and other parts, learning vast and valuable lessons. Tonight, on Life on the Swingset The Podcast,

MA 150: Relationship Anarchy 101 – Multiamory

Relationship Anarchy: what is it? Who invented it? Does it mean overthrowing the relationship government? This week we're looking at the original relationship anarchy manifesto written by Andie Nordgren and discussing what it all means and how it can apply to your relationships. If you want to support our show, the best way is to

MA 149: One is (Not) The Loneliest Number – Multiamory

This week we're talking about consciously choosing to stay single! Can staying single be just as emotionally valuable as being in a relationship? We have some surprising statistics as well as a look at how “single” can have a different meaning when you are a relationship anarchist or even if you're polyamorous. If you want

OTWC 017: Butt Stuff – On The Wet Coast

Butt stuff! It’s not just anal sex anymore, but a whole spectrum of ass play. What’s the appeal and the fascination? In our lifetime, it’s gone from being a secret perversion to borderline mainstream, referenced and discussed in pop culture both frankly and humorously. And some people feel increasingly pressured to make anal sex part

SS 308: Sexual Oddballs in a Vanilla World

As Lydia Deetz once said, "I myself am strange and unusual." Swingsetters are merry misfits who don't hew to society's traditional norms. Tonight, Ginger Bentham, Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, and Dr. Liz Powell discuss navigating the vanilla world as sexual oddballs, and the unique sets of perks and challenges that includes. Shoutout to

MA 148: Your Narcissistic Ex (Is Probably Not a Narcissist) – Multiamory

This week we’re talking about your narcissistic ex. To be more specific, we’re talking about narcissism — the word that seems to come out of everyone’s mouth when describing their ex. Today we’re going to explore what narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) really is, why everyone's talking about it, and why your ex was probably a

SS 307: It's Called Polyamory – With Rebecca Hiles and Tamara Pincus

The Swingset invites Tamara Pincus and Rebecca Hiles, authors of the new book "It's Called Polyamory" onto the show to discuss the many things people both new and experienced to nonmonogamy, specifically, polyamory, may encounter. They join Dylan Thomas, Dr. Liz Powell, and Chris Pent. Find Tamara Pincus' and Rebecca Hiles' new book, It's Called

MA 147: Relationship RADAR: Scrum 2.0 – Multiamory

After a whole year of experimenting with applying agile scrum to relationships, the Multiamory crew is proud to present our new and improved relationship check-in model: RADAR! Learn about the benefits of establishing a regular monthly check-in for your relationships, plus follow our easy step-by-step process for creating a safe, supportive, and productive way to

SEAGG 032: The Very Kinky Birthday Show – Sex Ed A Go-Go

Boudoir photographer and costar of “Sex Talk with Kenyon and Chris”, Chris Comfort, and the Grace Jones of burlesque, Sweet Lorraine, joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on July 22nd for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     On this episode of special birthday edition of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola

MA 146: Fear of Missing Out – Multiamory

We all know what it feels like to experience FOMO — fear of missing out. Whether it's scrolling through Facebook and seeing how much more fun everyone else seems to be having, or it's sitting at home watching a partner head out on an exciting date with a new partner, FOMO can make us feel

SS 306: Live at Desire, A Restatement of Values – #ssdesire

Ginger Bentham, Cooper S. Beckett, and Dylan Thomas return to Desire Resort & Spa for Swingset's second full resort takeover and for their sixth annual pilgrimage to the sexiest place on earth. While the tequila flows, they take time to examine why pleasure, gratitude, compassion, and love are supremely important, and they take time to defiantly

MA 145: Why Gratitude Isn't Bullshit (#Blessed) – Multiamory

“We've all heard the saying, “”You have to love yourself before you can love someone else.”” But is that actually true? This week, the Multiamory crew explores positive psychology, gratitude, and fostering personal wellbeing in your relationships. Myers-Briggs vs VIA: ” If you want to support our show, the best way is to

MA 144: Multi-Cultural Dating and Culturally Intelligent Relationships (Live Show in Tokyo) / 東京マルチアモリーライブショー – Multiamory

The Multiamory crew is in Tokyo! In this very special live episode recorded at Good Heavens British Pub in Setagaya, we discuss how increasing your cultural intelligence can boost your understanding and communication, particularly when dating someone from a very different culture. マルチアモリーの仲間が、東京にやってきました!ポリアモリー、セクシュアリティ、キンク、リレーションシップについての示唆に富んだ議論を楽しみ、参加者と交流し、ポッドキャストのライブ収録の機会にご参加ください。マルチアモリーのミッションは、倫理的な非一夫一婦制の実践についての知識と教育を、楽しく親しみやすい内容を通して提供することです。 は、Emily Matlack、Jase Lindgren、そして「The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory」の著者であるDedeker Winstonによる、情報リソース、ブログ、ポッドキャストです。意識的な一夫一婦制から、倫理的ポリアモニー、そして急進的なリレーションシップアナーキーまで、愛の多様な形式について、新しいアイデアやアドバイスを提供します。私たちの長年にわたる個人的な経験と、現在利用可能な最高の情報を組み合わせ、それを楽しく示唆に富んだ、そしてあなたのリレーションシップに簡単に適用できる方法で提案します。 With Interpreter: Without

OTWC 016: Sex Toys – On The Wet Coast

We on the Wet Coast are huge fans of sex toys. We have a large collection and use them regularly both in solo play and with our partners. We've tried a lot of different things and have learned through extensive trial and error what types of toys work best for us, since not every toy

SS 305: Designing Your Perfect Relationship, with Dr. NerdLove

We've all spent a big chunks of our your lives trying to transform relationships from "kind of okay" into "good". Most of us wait to have big conversations about what our relationships will look like until, well, long after they're already a problem, but what if we could, instead, do that work early instead of

MA 143: Mindful Sex and Ethical Porn (with author Jessica Graham) – Multiamory

The Multiamory crew is excited to welcome Jessica Graham, meditation teacher, mindfulness coach, and author of the new book Good Sex: Getting Off Without Checking Out. Jessica answers all of our questions about mindful sex, ethical porn, naturally boosting your sex drive, and much more. If you want to support our show, the best way

SS 304: Pants Feelings – Things That Make You Go Mmmmmm

Attraction. Chemistry, Urges. Biting our lower lip. Pants Feelings. *grunt* Join Dirty Lola, Mike Joseph, Mister Pent, and Dylan Thomas as they welcome back Bex from The Dildorks as they all talk about what turns them on! You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe

MA 142: Do You Have Healthy Relationship Expectations? – Multiamory

This week we are talking about expectations — a force for both good and evil! The expectations we bring to a relationship can have a significant effect on how happy or unhappy we are as the relationship unfolds. In this episode we'll uncover both unhealthy and healthy expectations to have for a relationship or a

MA 141: Solving Sexual Incompatibility – Multiamory

This week we are talking about sexual incompatibility and infidelity. Opening up about sex is often a challenging and vulnerable part of any relationship, and it can cause some relationships to implode. Today we are going to offer some stits and stats regarding sexual incompatibility, sexual changes over time, and how non-monogamy can shape and help

SS 303: Low Value Dick and Accessible Messaging

We've answered the same question a lot lately: How do single men navigate the lifestyle? We've rightfully mentioned the mountain most single men must climb to be successful, In discussing how to raise everyone's game we focused on the fact that many single cis straight men ruin it for everyone as they're everywhere and generally

MA 140: The Jealousy Survival Guide (with author Kitty Chambliss) – Multiamory

This week we're speaking with Kitty Chambliss, coach, speaker, and author of the soon to be released Jealousy Survival Guide. Kitty shares with us the lessons she's learned as a polyamorous person who still struggles with jealousy and offers her insight and techniques for managing jealousy as it occurs in the moment with grace, ease,

SS 302: Making Room in Life for the Things That Matter

Sometimes we lose sight of some of the people and some of the things that matter in ourlives. Dr. Liz Powell, Mike Joseph, and Dylan Thomas get together and figure out how to recognize it, how it happens, and how to pull everything back together. Dr. Liz also takes some time to relay some con

OTWC 015: Getting Things Started – On The Wet Coast

Getting things started is not always easy. Sending that first message on a dating site. Putting yourself out there with your romantic or sexy interest. Asking for that first kiss. Or even knowing how to flip that switch from social time to sexytime in a dating scenario – or play party. On this episode of

MA 139: Love is (Not) All You Need – Multiamory

Multiamory loves The Beatles, but we take issue with the assertion that love is all you need. In this episode, we discuss the dangers of what is traditionally “magical” thinking surrounding love and relationships. If you're in a relationship that is dysfunctional, codependent, or making you miserable all in the name of love, here's where

MA 138: Conscious Monogamy – Multiamory

What is conscious monogamy? The term gets thrown around on many polyamory and non-monogamy blogs, but there isn't really a set definition for it. This week, we examine the nature of being conscious in one's relationships, whether you're monogamous or not. In contrast, we also highlight a few of the unhealthy forms of traditional monogamy,

SS 301: Gang Bang the Mailbag 34 – Inquiring Swingers Want to Know

Tonight, Madam Fierce joins the Mike Joseph, Dirty Lola, and Dylan to re-open the mailbag once again to give it the gang bang it deserves. The crew answers questions on the difference between swinging and polyamory, breaking up with another swing couple, swinging with too much enthusiasm, single male swingers, and first time swinging hiccups.

MA 137: Intersectionality and Polyamorous Communities (with therapist Ruby Bouie Johnson) – Multiamory

We're very pleased to speak with Ruby Bouie Johnson, sex therapist and founder of PolyDallas Millennium, an annual symposium of presentations and workshops on polyamory with a focus on centering people of color, queer, and gender fluid voices. Ruby shares with us her thoughts on the need for an intersectional focus in poly communities, handling

SS 1: Dipping a Toe In – How To Start Swinging – Transcript

In our first podcast (all the way back from 2010!) we discuss the very beginnings of what to do when you think you may want to have an open relationship. We talk in detail about dealing with that idea yourself and deciding if opening up is right for you. We also deal with the first

MA 136: Healing Old Wounds and Resentment in Relationships – Multiamory

Long-term relationships can be fertile ground for wonderful things like deep bonding and silly in-jokes. But they can also come with their fair share of old hurts, repetetive arguments, and growing resentment. If you find your partner holding the past against you, feeling hurt and upset even after you've apologized for something in the past,

OTWC 014: Fitting In – On The Wet Coast

Like so many things in our lives, non-monogamous activity can be cyclical. There are times when we're out there dating a ton and boning all the sexy people, when we have the time and energy to enjoy the sexy connections we have made and will make. Yet there are other times when we need to

SS 300: Live, atop Mt. Swingset at the Ski Chalet!

Life on the Swingset gets back together at the ski chalet, high atop Mt. Swingset, except it's August and the air conditioning is on. The chair lifts aren't active so Ginger, Mike Joseph, Dirty Lola, Chris Pent, Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, Dr. Liz Powell, and Katie Mack had to make their way up the old fashioned

MA 135: What's Your Apology Language? – Multiamory

Our favorite God-doctor Gary Chapman, creator of the 5 Love Languages, has come up with another useful tool for communication: the 5 Apology Languages. Have you ever apologized to your partner for a mistake in the past, only to find that your partner brings it up again a week later, expressing frustration that you never

SS 299: Foreplay and Changing Ideas of Sex

When people think of sex, they generally assume there's penile penetration, probably into a vagina, and that everything leading up to that penetration is foreplay. It's a very narrow view, but it's a view that stubbornly persists into non-monogamy. Tonight, on our #roadto300, we consider this episode on foreplay as foreplay. Dirty Lola, Dr. Liz Powell,

MA 134: Legal Protections for Polyamorous Families (with lawyer Diana Adams) – Multiamory

The Multiamory crew is thrilled to speak with lawyer Diana Adams, who runs a law firm based in New York and Frankfurt that primarily provides family law and mediation services to the LGBTQ community, polyamorous families, same-sex couples, platonic co-parents, and non-nuclear families. In this episode, we got so much helpful information from Diana, including

SEAGG 031: The Pillow Lovers Show – Sex Ed A Go-Go

Burlesque MC and gad about, Bastard Keith and the glamorous performer and sexual rights advocate, Zyra Lee Vanity, joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on April 22nd for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go. Hey loves! Due to technical difficulties beyond our control the audio for this podcast is a bit wonky.

SS 298: Putting Ourselves Out There In Sex & Relationships

It is always risky, telling people what you're into, what you want, that you like them, but as we've found out it's often essential in getting anywhere in non-monogamy and in life. Tonight Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, Dr. Liz Powell, and Dylan Thomas discuss how to put yourself out there and how to take it

MA 133: 6 Questions You Must Ask Your New Partner – Multiamory

A long list of “glass ceiling questions” has been floating around the polyamorous internet lately. These are questions that are essential to ask a new partner in order to get down to brass tacks on what kind of agreements or rules they have in their other relationships, what they are expecting for their relationship with

MA 132: The Ethical Slut 20th Anniversary with Janet Hardy – Multiamory

The Ethical Slut, long considered to be the “Bible” of polyamory and alternative relationships, is celebrating its 20th anniversary with a new, updated edition! The book had an incredible impact on each of our lives, and we are so excited to be speaking to co-author and educator Janet Hardy. Janet shares with us what's new

SS 297: Pursuing Threesomes

Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, and Dr. Liz Powell get together to discuss threesomes, the bests, the worsts, and the firsts Check out Swinger Safari, the mobile app that has privacy, filter, and geolocation features unlike anything the Swingset has used before! Download the app for free and use the promo code LOTSS to get

MA 131: Dumpster Fire Relationships – Multiamory

The dumpster fire relationship: you know it when you see it. Constant fights, endless drama, and an unmatched level of emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion. In this episode, we'll discuss signs that your relationship might be a total dumpster fire, how to evaluate whether or not it's time to leave, plus practical advice on escaping

OTWC 013: Fitting In – On The Wet Coast

People whose identities don't conform to the norms within a community often feel isolated from that community. Figuring out how to fit in when you don't hew to the line of a group is an incredible challenge. Bisexuals don't always feel at home in LGBTQ community and are often deliberately isolated from it. Switches don't

MA 130: Emotional Labor – Multiamory

This week we're digging in to emotional labor — the mental and emotional energy required to maintain a relationship. All interpersonal relationships require some sort of emotional labor, so it's not a bad thing. However, problems arise when one person is giving more emotional labor than they are receiving from the other side. This disproportionately

SS 296: Dick Pics and Dating Profiles w/Cunning Minx

When setting up your dating profile, be it monogamous, poly, or swinger, if you're considering putting a big close up of your dick front and center, you MAY want to reconsider. Tonight the Cunning Minx, host of Polyamory Weekly and co-author of the new book: No Dick Pics: Your Guide to Creating an Irresistible Online

MA 129: Multiamory Answers Your Questions (Vol. II) – Multiamory

This week we are talking about…you! That's right, this week the Multiamory crew tackles the questions that our listeners left on the Multiamory voicemail line. If you want to have a question answered on the air, you too can leave a voicemail for us at 678-MULTI-05. Covered in this episode: — My girlfriend doesn't want

SS 295: Mortality

Most of us, especially when young, hope that death will never come, or at least not for a really really long time, and that can mean being unprepared when it does. Difficulties with visitation, inheritance, and others are issues ignored at our own peril. Dr. Liz Powell talks personally and painfully about Elliot, a partner

MA 128: How to Support Your Partner Through a Break-Up – Multiamory

Break ups suck. They suck a little less if you're not the one going through it, but if it's your partner who's just been dumped, then you may find yourself shouldering the burden of some of their suck as well. In this episode we talk about the ways to care for your partner, your self,

SS 294: Game Changers: When Awesome People Upset our Carefully Planned Lives

Non-monogamy definitely ups the ante on BUSY, which causes many of us to try to organize and plan our lives as carefully as possible. We say things like "I'm not going to date anyone new right now, or like some fool said last week, I'm not going to have long distance relationships anymore." So, Dr.

MA 127: Relationship Agreement Pitfalls – Multiamory

This week we're discussing agreement pitfalls — common relationship agreements that seem reasonable, but which may cause trouble in the long run. The Multiamory crew has a pretty firm stance against strict rules in relationships, but there are many agreements that fall into a debatable grey area. Is it fair to make sure you and

SS 293: Long Distance Relationships & Keeping it Sexy

We have a habit here of finding people fascinating on social media and at conferences, and so often they seem to live so very far away... like many members of the Swingset. Mike Joseph, Cooper S. Beckett, Dr. Liz Powell, and Dylan Thomas get together to discuss the distance between all us and how we

MA 126: Building Intimacy with Multiamory – Multiamory

This week, the Multiamory crew falls in love with each other! (Just kidding. We were already in love with each other.) But really, we delve into the topic of building intimacy, using the famous list of 36 intimacy questions. We encourage you to use these questions to not only get closer to your romantic partners,

OTWC 012: Impermanence, Breakups, and Relationship Transitions – On The Wet Coast

Not every relationship lasts forever–Whaaa?–turns out that happily ever after was kind of a fraudulent bill of goods we were sold as kids watching Disney movies. Relationships end or sometimes transition into subtly or entirely different forms. Tonight On The Wet Coast, Flick Morrison and Kat Stark are discussing Impermanence, Breakups, and Relationship Transitions. Follow

MA 125: Researching Non-Monogamous Relationships (with researcher Ryan Witherspoon) – Multiamory

This week the Multiamory crew gets to pick the brain of researcher, educator, and Ph.D candidate Ryan Witherpsoon. Ryan has specialized in studying consensual non-monogamy, kink, and BDSM, as well as spearheading several research studies on non-traditional relationships. In this episode, we cover the current state of non-monogamy research, particular challenges that arise when studying

SS 292: Building Our Sexy Community in the Most Pleasurable Place on Earth

Over the last five years, the Swingset has seen first hand the glorious moments and difficulties of building our own community on our trips to the most pleasurable place on earth at Desire Resort in Cancun. This year represents our second takeover, and our sixth trip, and tonight we're joined by all the hosts of

MA 124: The Dating Advice Girl Talks Polyamory – Multiamory

This week we are welcoming special guest Erin Tillman, a.k.a. The Dating Advice Girl. Erin has coached many singles through the process of creating a dating profile and going on dates without getting burnt out in the process. Even better, Erin is tuned in to the polyamorous and queer communities. She shares with us her

SEAGG 030: The Dating and Dicks Show – Sex Ed A Go-Go

Witchy woman and musician, Mima Good and the sensual sensation, Joie Nouveau, joined Dirty Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on March 27th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go. Hey loves! Due to technical difficulties beyond our control the audio for this podcast is a bit wonky. We cleaned it up as

SS 291: Planning an Orgy – The Dynamics of Group Sex

In traditional one on one sex, you pretty much know who you'll be engaging with, but when that complexity deepens to three, four, five or more (which is where we switch to the term orgy) there are a lot more, ahem, moving parts, to contend with. Group sex has a special set of dynamics, so

MA 123: The Science of Happy Relationships – Multiamory

Love and science finally hook up. The results? Sexy. This week we're covering all the things that will make your relationships better, backed by scientific studies. We cover communication, fighting, sex, in-jokes, and more! You can follow along with us here: If you want to support our show, the best way is to become

SS 290: Gang Bang the Mailbag 33 – My Wife and I, the Sequel

We're Gang Banging the Mailbag once again, it is in fact our 33rd time! Today, Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, Dr. Liz Powell, and Dylan Thomas answer your listener questions! Also, Dylan wants to throw a shoutout to Bex Caputo, aka: @BexTalksSex on Twitter, for their article: Changing What You Love: On Considering Hormones While You're

MA 122: Multiamory Answers Your Questions – Multiamory

This week we are talking about…you! That's right, this week the Multiamory crew tackles the questions that our listeners left on the Multiamory voicemail line. If you want to have a question answered on the air, you too can leave a voicemail for us at 678-MULTI-05. Covered in this episode: — How can a straight,

MA 121: Social Media and Relationships – Multiamory

This week, we're talking about the effects of social media on your relationships, and some of the unique challenges presented to non-monogamous relationships. Whether you're creeping on your metamours, or finding yourself nervous about posting openly about your multiple partners, we're here to help you navigate the tricky etiquette and foibles of social media. If you

SS 289: Gang Bang the Mailbag 32 – “My Wife and I”

Eighteen episodes is the longest we've ever gone without a listener mailbag episode, so tonight we've dug in deep with a new collection of listener questions including a highly coveted voicemail (573-55-SWING folks)! Dr. Liz Powell, Mike Joseph, Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, and Dylan Thomas field your questions and dig deep. In addition to fielding a

OTWC 011: Sexy Vacations w Cooper Beckett – On The Wet Coast

Sexy Vacations can be one of the incredibly fun perks of a non-monogamous lifestyle. Going to different cities and countries is always amazing, but going to different places and having sex with people: that takes the amazing factor up to a whole new level. From hitting up locals via a dating site to visiting loves

SS 288: Masturbation – Our Touching Origins!

For many of us, masturbation is one of the first things to go when we're depressed. Tonight we're going to explore the flipside of our full throttled self love. The hows the whys the whens, on this episode we're rubbing one or two or three or more out. Mike Joseph, Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett,

SS 287: Why In The Butt? The Joy of Anal Sex

We talk about butts bunches. Many of us enjoy putting things in our butts. Some of us wish we enjoyed it. What we don't often get into is the whys of butt play, how to make it better, how to explore it at first, and why anal sex can be awesome, so Dirty Lola, Cooper

MA 118: Helping Your Partner Open Up – Multiamory

Whether you're opening up an existing relationship or beginning a relationship with someone who is new to polyamory, it can be challenging to know the best way to encourage them to feel safe venturing into the world of non-monogamy. In this episode we explore different challenges and discuss what we've found to be the most

SS 286: Making Porn: The Sexy, the Silly, & The Mundane, with Kate Sinclaire

We've talked a lot about porn, often in high falutin ways about its importance (cuz it is important), its ability to change the world (cuz it has that), its danger of extinction (oh my the politics), and its ability to be beautiful. What we haven't discussed much is how sexy it can be, and how

MA 117: Why Do You Want What You Want? – Multiamory

This week we are tackling the complicated task of deconstructing desire. In life, we often set our sights on accomplishing a particular goal or attaining a particular object or status, and the same is true with relationships and sex. In this episode, we dig into the reasons why we want the things that we want,

SS 285: Keeping it Sexy in Unsexy Times

We've all had the experience of life getting in the way of our sexy. Sometimes life pounds us with things that try to compel us to STAY DOWN. Tonight, Ginger Bentham returns and joins Mike Joseph, Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, and Dylan Thomas to discuss keeping it sexy through the curves life throws at

MA 116: Being Monogamous in a Polyamorous World (Live Show) – Multiamory

In this very special live show, the Multiamory crew digs into the day-to-day foibles of having non-normative relationships in a hetero-mono-normative world. We discuss the uncomfortable consequences of having few outlets and even fewer role models, needing to stay in the closet in order to protect your job or family, and the endless assumptions and

OTWC 010: Female Relationships Part Two – On The Wet Coast

In this episode of the On The Wet Coast podcast, we examine our experiences of public bisexuality through exhibitionism and how it relates to the male gaze, being good allies and supporting those more marginalized than us in the new political climate, and the pros and cons of doing the work of emotional labour in

SEAGG 029: The Black Girl Magic Show – Sex Ed A. Go-Go

Celebrated activist and internet phenomenon, Ericka Hart and the spectacular spectacle, Foxy Squire, joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on February 25th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     We kicked off the fourth season of Sex Ed A Go-Go with two amazing women.  It was a night filled with

SS 284: The Non-Monogamy Renaissance w/ Andre Shakti

Non-monogamy is riding a wave. Recently CNN had a positive article about the fact that more and more young people are choosing some flavor non-monogamy over traditional relationship forms. Awareness continues to grow exponentially, but with that comes the desperate need for a place to go to ask questions. Like us, our guest, the polyamory

MA 115: Cooper S. Beckett on Swinger Resorts and Sexy Vacations – Multiamory

Multiamory is happy to have author, podcast host, and pegging enthusiast Cooper S. Beckett back on the show! Cooper came on our show way back in the early days to discuss his memoir, My Life on the Swingset, and this week we are discussing his brand new novel, Approaching the Swingularity. Join us for a

SS Special: Cooper and Ginger Talk Approaching the Swingularity

Ginger continues the two-year tradition by sitting down with Cooper for a frank and intimate discussion about his new novel Approaching the Swingularity: Tales of Swinging & Polyamory, toxic masculinity, inclusion and diversity, sexuality, and sexy vacations and resorts. You can buy the book now RIGHT HERE at – use promo code SWINGSET at

MA 114: Privilege and Polyamory – Multiamory

This week, we are discussing privilege and polyamory — the different advantages and disadvantages that we often forget about when approaching non-traditional relationships. This is a hot-button topic that often sparks emotions and defensiveness, but we wanted to open up the conversation, daunting as it is. In this episode, we discuss many different factors that affect

OTWC 009: Female Relationships Part One – On The Wet Coast

The relationships between women in non-monogamy are rarely discussed other than that bisexual babes are hot together. Women have been taught to compete & struggle against even our closest female friends so how can we connect when there are people we love openly together? And how does it work when we're into each other too?

SS 283: Ethical Unicorn Hunting in Swinging & Polyamory – Life on the Swingset

While many people enter into non-monogamy when already “coupled,” there are some ways that folks approach this transition that can make folks like me feel more like prey than people. While there's nothing wrong with enjoying a threesome or wanting to both date the same person, unicorn hunting can quickly become predatory, coercive, and controlling.

MA 113: What is Romantic Love? (with philosopher Carrie Jenkins) – Multiamory

Multiamory is very excited to sit down with philosopher Carrie Jenkins, author of the newly released book What Love Is and What It Could Be. Carrie has been polyamorous for a number of years, and after having her relationships accused of not embodying “real love,” she was inspired to get to the bottom of the

MA 112: Choking on the Red Pill – Multiamory

This week, the Multiamory crew tackles a divisive and controversial subject: the Red Pill movement. The Red Pill movement, in our estimation, is equal parts men's rights and pick-up artistry, sprinkled with a dose of good old-fashioned misogyny. But a growing number of men are finding community, understanding, and confidence in the Red Pill's tenets.

Twin Peaks S02E10-E12 – Dispute Between Brothers, Masked Ball, & The Black Widow – Damn Good Podcast

As we move on from the Laura Palmer storyline, much like Garland Briggs, we go into the wilderness. As Hawk tells us this week, every soul must pass through the Black Lodge on their way to the White, and so we at Damn Good Podcast pass into the darkness of season two's horrible flabby middle.

SS 282: Playing with Disability w/ Andrew Gurza

When we talk about privilege, it's usually a matter of race and class, and boils down to us not seeing or not even knowing to look for the issues that others face. Andrew Gurza, our guest tonight, is a Disability Awareness Consultant and Cripple Content Creator, and they join joins Cooper, Dylan, Dr. Liz Powell,

SS 281: Finding and Being Community Role Models w/ Kevin Patterson

There is a sort of order from chaos that happens when like minded people discover others like themselves. Individuals become clusters, clusters become groups, and with groups come unavoidable growing pains, issues, conflict, and struggle. Still, there's a certain magic that comes from having a group of diverse and motivated people with a common role come

MA 111: Poly-Friendly Counseling – Multiamory

If you've hit a particularly sticky bump in your relationship, or if you're interested in doing some preventative maintenance and exploration, it is extremely helpful to seek professional guidance. Speaking with a therapist, counselor, or coach can provide many opportunities to open up and uncover deep-seated habits and patterns, plus really giving yourself and your

SS 280: Sharing & Oversharing: Putting Our Sex Lives on Stage with Lucas Brooks & Kinky Jean

After seven years of podcasting, it's rather shocking to us how much we put of our lives out into the ether. A podcast can be very much like a living document in that way. What compels us to share so much of ourselves? Probably some narcissism, but also an innate belief that personal information breeds

Twin Peaks S02E09: Arbitrary Law – Damn Good Podcast

Resolution. When Arbitrary Law originally aired, a lot of the audience for Twin Peaks had already abandoned it, perhaps not accepting the resolution that they'd been shown when Leland/BOB killed Maddy. It's a shame they did, because the performance Ray Wise gives here at the end of this episode is a treasure, as he vacillates

MA 110: Deconstructing Jealousy – Multiamory

We talk a lot about jealousy in the polyamory scene — how to manage it, how to de-program it, how to communicate with your partners about it. But in this episode, we are going to be deconstructing jealousy — categorizing specific triggers and their causes. If you have the tools to identify your jealousy triggers,

OTWC: 008 – Group Sex Part Two – On The Wet Coast

One of the exceedingly fun features of non-monogamy can be group sex. Sexy, sweaty bodies writhing in a naked pile can be an outstanding experience, but it's not without complications. There are different things to take into consideration whether you're navigating a threesome, foursome, fivesome or six plus orgy. On this episode of On The

Twin Peaks S02E08: Drive With A Dead Girl – Damn Good Podcast

We're in a post-Maddy world, now, and the “Who Killed Laura Palmer?” storyline is barrelling toward a conclusion. Ray Wise delivers a terrifying and sublime performance as Leland who may or may not be behind the wheel of his own body. We see him slide between composure, meek Leland, and the anger of BOB. Unfortunately,

MA 109: Ethical Unicorn Hunting (Live Show) – Multiamory

Unicorn hunters (heterosexual couples seeking to add a bisexual woman to their relationship) get a bad rap in the polyamorous community. But is it possible to defy this stereotype and add a third to your relationship in a way that's ethical, kind, and groovy for all parties involved? In this special live show recorded in Los

SS 279: The Allure of Paradise – The Swingset at Desire Resort

Tonight we celebrate two things, first, our 7th anniversary as a podcast, and second our first takeover of Desire Resort last November. It's no secret that there's been some…stuff…happening in the world. As that stuff started on our trip, we've been a little…loath to revisit. But now, to celebrate our anniversary, we have assembled an

Desire Week 2017! ESDA 080: Dungeon Desire DM Roundtable – Ending the Sexual Dark Age

Hello Swingset Fans and welcome to Desire week on the Swingset! The following podcast was recorded at Desire in November 2016 and features Duncan and Mrs. Duncan, Jeff and Francine, Swinger Doc and Sexy Pixie, Ropemaster and his lovely and of course, JV and Shara. If you want to join us in Desire from November

Desire Week 2017! GPSC 014: Closing the Deal, at the Swingset Desire Takeover – The Gentleperverts' Social Club

Hello Swingset Fans and welcome to Desire week on the Swingset! The following podcast was recorded at Desire in November 2016 and features Dr. Liz Powell, Chris aka. Mister Pent, and myself, and it is The Gentleperverts Social Club. If you want to join us in Desire from November 4th to the 11th in 2017,

MA 108: Solo Polyamory (Live Show) – Multiamory

Multiamory is in Portland! In this special, live-audience episode, we explore solo polyamory. The solo poly crowd is an often-misunderstood, yet significant portion of the non-monogamous community at large, and this week we uncover the many different ways solo polyamory can be practiced, examine couple privilege, and learn all about amatonormativity. You can order Dedeker's

Twin Peaks S02E07: Lonely Souls – Damn Good Podcast

Big shit goes down this week in Twin Peaks! We get the answer to the most important question that's been vexing us…just WHO THE HELL IS MR. TOJAMURA?! Well, not really, we also get pretty good idea who actually killed Laura Palmer this week. In addition to that, David Lynch has returned to direct and

Twin Peaks S02E06: Demons – Damn Good Podcast

We return from our extended hiatus to a changed world but choose to stay in the weird 1950s/1990s hybrid that is Twin Peaks. We talk about all the happenings in Peaks land, including The Secret History of Twin Peaks by Mark Frost, and new audiobooks of The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer and “Diane…” The

SS 278: From Dildos to Playrooms – Accessorizing Our Sexy Lives

You're all sexy and sophisticated human beings, You understand your sexuality and you enjoy both giving and receiving pleasure. Once you've figured all that out about yourself, where do you go? What do you do next? Tonight we talk about how to best accessorize your sexy life, from dildos and vibrators, to rolls of saran

MA 107: A Very Poly Valentine's Day (Live Show) – Multiamory

The Multiamory West Coast tour brought the crew to Seattle on February 14th. On this very traditional romantic holiday, we spent some time discussing how people in non-traditional relationships can use this as a time to reflect on the unique qualities each relationship and each partner brings to the table. We also discuss the slightly

OTWC: 007 – Group Sex Part One – On The Wet Coast

One of the exceedingly fun features of non-monogamy can be group sex. Sexy, sweaty bodies writhing in a naked pile can be an outstanding experience, but it's not without complications. There are different things to take into consideration whether you're navigating a threesome, foursome, fivesome or six plus orgy. What do you need to think

SS 277: On Gender, Feminism & Non-Monogamy with Dedeker Winston

It's no secret that women may have dramatically different experiences entering into the non-monogamous world than men, whether it's exploring dating on OkCupid, charting a path through swinger parties, or being a third in a couples' relationship. Dedeker Winston, co-host of Swingset.FM‘s Multiamory, and author of the new book The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory joins Dylan Thomas, Dr.

MA 106 – 7 Habits of Highly Effective Poly People (Live) – Multiamory

This week's episode was recorded during Multiamory's very first stop on their West Coast Tour 2017! Every seat in the house at Octopus Literary Salon in Oakland, California was full as we presented a talk on the 7 habits of highly effective polyamorous people. Drawing inspiration from our mentors and role models, we break down

MA 105: The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory – Multiamory

Our own Dedeker Winston's book, The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory comes out internationally today and we are so excited to be able to interview her about the book and share our own experiences with reading it. Dedeker talks to us about the importance of creating a book that empowers women to have agency in

SS 276: Our Finest Sexy Hours, #EXPLANABRAG

Used to be, we'd talk pretty endlessly about our sexual activity on this podcast, to the point where our MOST NEGATIVE REVIEW EVER called us out for it. But that's ages ago, and it's been quite a while, and we're feeling a little indulgent and want to have some sexy conversation. You may as well

MA 104: Polyamory in Movies and TV (Live Show) – Multiamory

This is a very special live presentation by the Multiamory crew that took place in Santa Monica on January 20th, 2017. In this episode we are discussing the various ways polyamory and non-monogamous relationships are portrayed in fictional movies, TV, and webseries. From hilarious to touching to bizarre, we explore what stories are currently being

SEAGG 028: The Fuck-It List Show – Sex Ed. A Go-Go

Comedic actress Hannah Abney, and the impossibly sexy Joie Nouveau, joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on November 3rd for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     We celebrated our 3rd Anniversary in November! It was a silly night filled with pizza, funfetti vulvas, and classy dick balloons. We celebrated three

OTWC: 006 – Disclosure – On The Wet Coast

All relationships require communication, but good communication is even more essential in ethically non-monogamous relationships where multiple people's needs and wants intersect. Each partnership has its own needs & rules for disclosure. How & when to make new information known can be one of the big challenges in non-monogamy, especially when saddled with baggage from

SS 275: The Myths of Sex & Porn Addiction with Dr. David Ley

It seems to happen like clockwork. Someone cheats, or gets caught in some sort of sex scandal. They have to make amends, show that they're working to fix “the problem” so they can return to their normal lives. While we on the Swingset happen to think that many of their normal lives might've been improved

MA 103: Relationship Agreements with Eri Kardos – Multiamory

This week we are very pleased to speak with Eri Kardos, international speaker, coach, and author of the newly released book Relationship Agreements. Eri takes us through the basic philosophy of using agreements to strengthen your relationships, whether you are polyamorous or monogamous. We also learn how a small, blue, furry monster named Fred can help change

SS 274: Never Finished – Improving Ourselves for Sex & Relationships

It's the New Year, 2017, and for much of our country that means halfhearted resolutions. I'm going to change. I'm going to improve. These resolutions come about because of the arbitrary timeline that defines last year and this year. We are unfinished, and as such, we can strive to always improve. We discuss working on

MA 102: Emotional Responsibility aka Owning Your Shit – Multiamory

If you've ever been in a relationship with a human being, chances are you've encountered some emotions within yourself and the other person. Until the day we are dating Vulcans or robots, our relationships will continue to be sticky, emotional, and not always rational. But all is not lost — a healthy dose of emotional

SS 273: Cybersecurity for our Naughty Bits, aka: Bring on 2017

We've been overdue for for a rapprochement with one of our favorite past topics: Privacy and Security in Swinging & Polyamory.The team of Mister Pent and Dylan Thomas put together information about securing yourself on the internet that a panel also including Dr. Liz Powell, Mike Joseph, and Cooper S. Beckett could discuss, digest, and

MA 101: Gender Non-Conformity 101 – Multiamory

This week on Multiamory, Jase and Emily get all Gender Non-Specific with our special guest, professional cuddliest and dominatrix, Tate Ashley!  Tate helps us explore queer theory, gender “extremes” vs. gender “middle ground,” and language and its inefficiency when referring to gender non-conformity. The three of us also reveal the childhood experiences that helped shape

MA 100: Relationship Resolutions – Multiamory

It's Multiamory's 100th episode! It's a new season! It's a new year! And that means….New Year's Resolutions. Download the worksheet here to use in your own relationships! In this episode we are discussing how to make resolutions for your relationships in 2017. However, this isn't your typical discussion on goal-setting. We are going to be taking you

SS 272: Beyond Kinsey – Sliding Across the Sexuality Spectrum

One of the main reasons that so many of us leave monogamous relationships is the realization that we or our partners may not be as hetero as we thought. Non-monogamy can provide an exceptional opportunity to go beyond Kinsey's Scale, and view the entire spectrum of sexuality that spreads out before us, learning about ourselves

MA 099: I Got 99 Problems but 2016 Ain't One – Multiamory

2016 was a challenging year, but the Multiamory crew is tired of all the doom and gloom. In this episode, we review the good parts of 2016. A lot of great things happened for the Multiamory podcast, for the polyamory community, and for all three of us! Join us in generating some positivity to combat

SEAGG 027: The Bianca and Lola Show – Sex Ed A Go Go

NYC based burlesque performer, art muse, and firecracker, Bianca Dagga joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on September 1st for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go.     We were one guest short for our first show back after a busy summer hiatus, but Bianca and Lola joined forces and the Pussy

SEAGG 026: The Pepperoni and Compromise Show – Sex Ed A Go Go

NYC based Burlesque MC, writer, singer, and gadabout, Bastard Keith and the “Hidden Treasure of Burlesque”  Mandarine Moon-fly, joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head on October 6th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go!     Doing a live show in NY can be very tricky. Sometimes you end up with a

SS 271: Gang Bang The Mailbag 31

Welcome to Gang Bang The Mailbag TRIPLE X (plus 1)!  We're recording tonight with a live (and muted) studio audience! As always, questions have been edited for content and clarity. As usual, answers have not been edited for content or clarity! If you have a question for a future listener mailbag, please give us a

MA 098: Happy Poly-Days Part 2: This Time It's Personal – Multiamory

The holidays are upon us, and so is the holiday stress! This week we are talking about all the aspects of the holidays that makes us fall into a temporary stress-induced insanity. We also give insights on managing the holidays with multiple partners and how to tackle coming out to your family members. But most

Love Will Out – Thoughts From The Brink at the End of 2016

It's really been a year, hasn't it? I know I've been quieter than usual, at least here on the blog. I've been outspoken to the point of blithering loudmouth elsewhere, though. Including a misguided, if impassioned, attempt to reign in someone trolling in a Trump hat on election night at #SSDesire. 

SS 270: Gang Bang The Mail Bag XXX

Welcome to Gang Bang The Mailbag TRIPLE X! That's right, this is our thirtieth listener mailbag episode, and we're recording tonight with a live (and muted) studio audience! As always, questions have been edited for content and clarity. If you have a question for a future listener mailbag, please give us a call at 573-557-9464

MA 097: Agile Scrum Your Relationships – Multiamory

This week we are discussing a unique communication system to try out in your relationships: agile scrum. The agile scrum system was originally developed to be applied to software development, but writer Alanna Krause adapted the system to become a new system for communication in her relationship.  The Multiamory crew tested out holding monthly scrum meetings with

SS 269: Dating on the Outskirts of Sexuality – LGBTQ Matchmaking with Claire Ah

Dating in the heteronormative world is difficult. It's also bizarre enough that hundreds of comedies and dramas are made about dating every year. When you zoom down to that subsection of the culture, the minorities of the LGBTQ community who are seeking others in that same minority, it gets more complicated. Tonight we're joined by

MA 96: Poly Storytelling and Diversity with Jackie Stone – Multiamory

This week we are excited to speak with Jackie Stone, director of the poly-themed web series, Compersion. Jackie shares with us her inspiration to tell the story of a monogamous couple opening up their marriage, and her commitment to bringing gritty realism to her storytelling. We also open up the discussion surrounding race, diversity, and representation

SS 268: Being Sex Positive from Inside the Non-Monogamy Closet

A large percentage of us dwell pretty securely within the non-monogamy closet. Friends and family may know something is different about us, but they rarely know fully what is up. That said, we live in a world where being sex-positive and progressive can make a big difference, as can standing with those who are bravely

MA 95: All About Consent with Sex Nerd Sandra – Multiamory

This week the Multiamory crew is very excited to intereview sex educator and podcast host for The Nerdist, Sex Nerd Sandra! Sandra takes us through the complex world of consent within relationships and sexual encounters. We discuss the education about consent, the ways that men and women both respect and violate consent differently, and also about how

SS 267: Swingset Takes Over Desire

Life on the Swingset hosts its fifth annual trip to Desire Resort & Spa in Cancún, right in the heart of the Riviera Maya. Cooper, Dylan, Dr. Liz, Lyndzi, and Mr. Pent sit under the thatched roof and next to the bar of the rooftop hot tub and talk Fridays, resort staff, about the cosmic

SS 266: Asking For What You Want Leads to Better Sex

Communication. It doesn't need to be said, yet as it's the answer to so many questions we get asked, it really can't be overstated. One of the most important parts of communication when it comes to sexy time, is learning to ask for what you want, so we discuss that in today's episode of Life

MA 93: Being Secondary While Putting Yourself First – Multiamory

At Multiamory, we generally discourage people from building their relationships on a basis of strict, primary-secondary hierarchy. However, primary-secondary relationships are still very common in the polyamorous community. All three of us have engaged in these kind of relationships at one point or another, for better or worse. In this episode, we talk about the

MA 92: Should You Come Out of the Closet? – Multiamory

Coming out to partners, family, friends, or co-workers about being polyamorous is an important decision that could potentially change your life and your relationships, for better or worse. In this episode, we run you through the most important risks and benefits to consider before deciding to come out to someone important. If you want to

MA 91: The Polyamorous Man: Masculinity and Non-Monogamy – Multiamory

What does it mean to “be a man”? What are the classic hallmarks of masculinity, and how are those expectations both hurting and helping us? What's more, we discuss how traditional notions of masculinity sometimes clash with the ideals of polyamory.   If you want to support our show, the best way is to become

SS 265: Bi Invisibility & The Closet

It's no secret that in the pantheon of the LGBT spectrum, bisexual people are looked down upon, told they don't really exist, avoided in dating life. Bisexuals also often feel less pressure to come out, as they can so easily pass as one side or the other. Paradoxically, this leads to bi invisibility and erasure,

OTWC: 005 – Autonomy – On The Wet Coast

On this episode Kat & Flick are discussing autonomy in non-monogamy. How emphasizing autonomy for yourself and your partners serves your relationships, and the tricky situations and consequences that can come up related to owning your independent self. Even if it doesn't seem like it, we choose how much we let other people's needs and wants

MA 90: Poly Processing Groups – Multiamory

Have you ever felt alone on your poly journey? Do your friends or family immediately jump to blaming polyamory for any relationship problems you may have? We've definitely all encountered this and have wished for a better support network. On this episode we talk with two people who created their own Poly Processing Group that

MA 89: Make Poly Great Again – Multiamory

This week, the Multiamory crew is pissed off. The current political climate has inspired us to vent about a number of topical things that get under our skin: toxic masculinity, sexual harassment, the alt right, and more. In particular, we examine how the polyamorous community is not immune to these things, as well as addressing

SS 264: Couples' Privilege & the Notion of the Third

As couples, so often we're looking for the third. The unicorn usually. They're rare, seemingly unobtainable, but when we find them it's just so magical. Except that we're often boxing that unicorn in, that single person who now has to put up with our pre-established couples dynamic and the fact that if we ghosted it'd

SS 263: Let's Get Sexting – Dirty Talk and Naked Pics

We all send dirty comments, dirty pictures, full on sext-travaganzas with our partners, playmates, friends straddling the edge of naughty. Tonight we're joined by the Swinging MILF herself, Sally Swings to talk about sending each other dirty pictures and messages through sexting.     Today's episode of Life on the Swingset is sponsored by Better

MA 087: 5 Mistakes Poly N00bs Make – Multiamory

For a long time there haven't been many public role models to demonstrate healthy, high-functioning polyamory, in contrast to the many demonstrations of monogamy we see every day on TV, movies, and other corners of the media. It's easy to make mistakes when first venturing down the path of non-monogamy. This week, we take you

SS 262: Why We Play With Others

When people consider exploring non-monogamy, we tell them to picture a pretty good but occasionally difficult relationship (ie, every relationship) and then picture it expanding exponentially because you've added more people. Eventually becoming a tesseract of interlocking and interconnected parts. Each of those parts, believe it or not, have a mind of their own. We've

MA 086: Sustainable Relationships – Multiamory

Sustainability means making decisions that address the needs of the present without compromising the needs of the future. The term is most often applied to environmental policy, but how does the concept of sustainability apply to relationships? Are poly relationships more sustainable than monogamous ones? If you want to support our show, the best way is to

SS 261: Mistakes Happen – Processing After Boundary Violations or Safer Sex Failures

It's pretty much a given that, at some point or another in swinging or polyamory, there will be boundary violations, safer sex failures, and other moments you'd talked about and thought about and made rules about. No matter how much hypothetical thought goes into it, though, often being confronted with these things in the real

MA 085: Meeting Your Metamours – Multiamory

Having a positive relationship with your metamours can dramatically improve the quality of your relationship landscape. In this episode we cover the who, what, where, when, why, and how of meeting your metamours and setting yourself up for the best possible outcomes. If you want to support our show, the best way is to become

OTWC 004: Triads – On The Wet Coast

On this episode we be discussing Triad relationships with special guest Iris @irisopens on Twitter Flick & I are podcasting from our first triad getaway (sorry about the unavoidable background noise) with our awesome girlfriend Iris and she's joining us to talk about this unique & challenging non-monogamous relationship style. None of us expected to

Twin Peaks S02E05: The Orchid's Curse – Damn Good Podcast

We reach a shaky point in Twin Peaks history, as a number of the cartoonier plot points begin to draw themselves front and center, with Leo potentially returning home, freakishly strong Nadine's high school memory, and of course more with the Hardy Girls Donna and Maddy. A brief bit of light comes when Lara Flynn

SS 260: Double Penetration and Other Varsity Sexual Moves

There are few acts in the pantheon of sexuality that carry with them so much intrigue, coveting, and fear, as double penetration, and its more advanced siblings double vaginal and double anal. For one thing, these really can't be done in a monogamous relationship. Oh sure, we can use dildos and such things, but that's

MA 084: Zen and the Art of First Dates – Multiamory

If you are new to poly or just opening up your relationship, you may come to a realization that is exciting for some and terrifying for others: time to go on first dates! Going on first dates when you're poly presents a whole host of unique benefits and challenges. In this episode, we lay out

SEAGG 025: The CatalystCon Studio Show – Sex Ed A. Go-Go

Wicked Pictures performer, director and humanitarian, Jessica Drake, and Good Vibrations very own Sex Toy Santa, Andy Duran, joined Lola on stage at Catalyst Con Midwest in Chicago on April 2nd for a special installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go. We were honored to be asked to be a part of Ccon Studios. Recording with

SS 259: Polyamorous as a Person of Color, with Mike Joseph

While we're pretty good on the Swingset at talking about our experiences in polyamory and swinging, We have limits to our shared experience, so we reached out and asked Mike Joseph to join the Swingset and speak to us about his experience navigating dating and polyamory as a person of color. We discussed some of the

MA 083: The Triforce of Communication – Multiamory

It's dangerous to go alone…take this! It's the Triforce of Communication! What is that, you ask? The Triforce of Communication, other than being a nerdy title, are the three primary goals of communication in any given conversation or interaction with a partner. Communication breakdowns often occur when you and your partner have mismatched goals. If

SS 258: Gang Bang The Mailbag 29 – Post-Pregnancy Swinging, Grower vs. Shower

Ginger takes the cords of the mailbag and sits down with Dylan and a LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE as they answer listener questions for the 29th Gang Bang the Mailbag! The Swinger Doc also sits down for another edition of the Medical Mailbag! In this mailbag he answers a listener question on risks associated with hot tub sex!     Questions in

MA 082: Multiple Attachment Styles for Multiple Partners – Multiamory

Descriptio This week we are discussing the theory of attachment in adults. That may sound daunting, but it's actually quite simple. Your individual attachment style is how you react when a particular relationship experiences separation, threat, or pressure. Some people react by becoming clingy and impulsive, and others react by pushing the other person away.

SEAGG 024: The Hot Tub in the Woods Show – Sex Ed A. Go-Go

On this episode of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola and the crew chat about the art of the Pussy Tickle, never being tired of talking about sex, getting your mojo back, Star Trek kinkery, and why hot tubs in the woods can be dangerous things. Seriously. NY poet, author, and educator, Mo Beasley, and the

OTWC 003: Mental Illness – On The Wet Coast- copy

Hey Swingsetters, Cooper here – Today we're running an episode of our new Swingset.FM podcast On The Wet Coast, where I discuss depression and other mental illness with Kat Stark and Serious Flick. If you like what you hear, head over to to subscribe. On this episode we'll be discussing mental illness in non-monogamy with

MA 081: Multi-versary: The Sequel – Multiamory

The Multiamory podcast just turned two years old! Welcome to the terrible twos, baby! On this episode, we give a recap of all the things we've accomplished in the past two years, much of it with the inspiration of our wonderful listeners and fans. We also talk about the personal turning points we've each had in

OTWC 003: Mental Illness – On The Wet Coast

On this episode we'll be discussing mental illness in non-monogamy with special guest Cooper S Beckett from Life On The Swingset podcast and Those of us in non-monogamous circles spend a unique amount of time relating with others in a very intimate manner. When we let go of the standard social narrative of one partner only

SS 257: On Breasts and Attraction

Cooper gets the night off as Ginger makes herself available to Dylan to discuss his attraction to breasts, and his fear that they are the focus of too much attention and energy. The Swinger Doc sits down for another edition of the Medical Mailbag! In this mailbag he answers a listener question on how to find high quality

MA 80: Multiple Love Languages, Multiple Lovers – Multiamory

Your love language is the way in which you express love and prefer to receive love from your partners. Each person has a unique combination of love languages, some stronger than others.  You may not realize it, but you and your partner may be speaking different love languages, which can lead to confusion and frustration. If

Twin Peaks S02E04: Laura's Secret Diary – Damn Good Podcast

Laura's Diary is revealed, and Leland is held accountable for the murder of Jacques Renault while other shenanigans happen and a very racist character shows up. Cooper is incensed by the lesser elements of this episode, namely Hank and Harold, and discusses the value of clearing out the cast. We talk about why some actors

MA 079: Polyamory and Spirituality – Multiamory

Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Welcome and namaste! This week we are talking about the spiritual side of alternative relationships. Polyamory has long been associated with the free love movement, which in turn has long been associated with the New Age spirituality of hippies. Though modern-day religions tend to condemn polyamorous relationships, there are a number of people in

IF 013: Energy Play – Intellectual Foreplay

Join Prof and Ginger in the bath while they bring you into their world of what they call “energy play.” They discuss ancient traditions, rejection of dogma, sensations, and how it is real for them. Ginger talks more about the practical “how to” for exploring energy play by yourself or with partners. Using mindfulness is

SS 256: Smoothing Re-Entry, When Our Partners Date or Play Without Us

All three of us here on the Swingset have occasionally dated and played independent of our partners, and all three of our partners have dated and played independent of us. A moment that can be tricky, especially early on in the swinging or poly lifestyles, is that moment of re-entry, where our partner (or us)

SEAGG 023: The Prince Show AKA The Bonus Show – Sex Ed A. Go-Go

Actress and filmmaker, Hye Yun Park, and the sultry Vera Safire joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head in New York City on May 5th for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go. This show was originally scheduled to air in May after the death of Prince, but due to technical difficulties and wonky

Twin Peaks S02E03: The Man Behind Glass – Damn Good Podcast

We're disappointed to learn that some of Season Two's…lesser storylines start up this week, with far too little time (though exceptional as it is) given to Ray Wise and Leland. The One Armed Man undergoes a transformation, Maddy laments being thought of like Laura, creepy Harold is creepy, and Lara Flynn Boyle gives an excellent

IF 012: Body Image – Intellectual Foreplay

Prof and Ginger take to the bath to take on body image. The honesty is as naked as Prof and Ginger themselves. A heartfelt, emotional conversation is here for you that is as raw as they have ever been. It’s a marathon Intellectual Foreplay episode, so brace yourself. Every BODY has a story and they

SS 255: People of Color in Kink Communities

We've talked a lot of bout community lately on the Swingset, and while we've specifically made the point that it's not enough to talk about diversity but to take action to seek it out, we've done a poor job of acknowledging that diversity includes diversity of racial background and we've contributed to a deafening silence

MA 077: Life Changes and Polyamory

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes! Change is an unavoidable part of life but that doesn't keep it from being scary sometimes. We have a lot of personal experience with big life changes like moving to new states or countries, deaths of family or friends, transitioning from monogamy to polyamory, and much more. In this episode we discuss some the

SEAGG 022: The Polyamory Show – Sex Ed A Go-Go

The creator of Poly Role Models, Kevin Patterson, and “The Witty Titty from the Big City”, Ravenessa,  joined Lola on stage at Otto’s Shrunken Head in New York City on June 2nd for another installment of Sex Ed A Go-Go. On this episode of Sex Ed A Go-Go, Lola and the crew chat about their

MA 076: Emotional Abuse and Polyamorous Relationships – Multiamory

It isn't easy or fun to talk about abuse. Abusive relationships come in many different iterations, and non-monogamous relationships are not exempt from these kinds of unhealthy dynamics. It's difficult for poly folk to speak publicly about abuse, as social stigma discourages many people from sharing any negative or darker aspects of poly relationships. In

OTWC 002: Stress – On The Wet Coast

On this episode we’re discussing Stress in ethical non-monogamy. There are so many positive aspects about open relationships but one of the negatives we’ve discovered is how stressful they can be. Everyone knows that jealousy, self-esteem issues, or mismatched levels of feelings can take their toll, especially when find ourselves managing them poorly or tamping

Twin Peaks S02E02: Coma – Damn Good Podcast

A trigger warning is apt, that image that scarred some of us for life, of BOB crawling over the furniture, is in this episode of Twin Peaks. We find quite a bit to like in this second Lynch directed episode of the season, and are thankful that its shorter run-time made way for a more

SS 254: The Pursuit of Playmates & Lovers in Swinging & Polyamory

How do you find other swingers? How do you find people to date? Those top a list of frequent questions we get on the Swingset. As outsiders looking in, as people curious to get started, we all wonder if we'll be able to do this, because there's that foreign concept in the middle. Finding people

MA 075: Primary Partners and Priority in Polyamory

Whew, that's a lotta P's! After many discussions inspired by our solo polyamory episode a few weeks ago, we decided to revisit the topics of hierarchy and priority. Some people insist that a primary/secondary hierarchy is the only that works for long-term polyamory. After all, if you want a house, kids, and any other number

SS 253: Between Swinging & Polyamory – The Haziness Intensifies

We're back! We took the longest (only) hiatus in Swingset History and each of us has come back rested and ready. Today we discuss the blurring of the line between swinging and polyamory and how things tend to evolve in ways well beyond our expectations. [HAZINESS INTENSIFIES] We recorded this podcast LIVE in front of

MA 074: Sex Positivity, Sex Negativity, Sex Neutrality – Multiamory

This week we are trying to pin down the slippery notion of sex positivity. Does it just mean the absence of sex negativity? Does it mean you have to be enthusiastic about all kinds of sex? What if you don't even have sex? We bandy about what “sex neutrality” might mean, as well as illuminate

OTWC 001: Jealousy – On The Wet Coast

On this episode – originally released on the Gentle Perverts Social Club Podcast Episode 11 on– we wade into the murky green waters of jealousy. We all know that as non-monogamous perverts, we're completely above jealousy. It's 100% full-time compersion up in here! Except we're not, and it's not. Jealousy affects all our relationships

Twin Peaks S02E01: May The Giant Be With You – Damn Good Podcast

It is happening again…It is happening again… A Damn Good Podcast About Twin Peaks returns, with hosts Cooper, Miko, and Ophilia discussing the Lynchiest Lynchian season premiere that ever Lynched. In a double-length episode that uses its excess time for recapping season one, we get some moments that're truly wonderful, with the peak, of course,

MA 073: Solo Polyamory – Multiamory

What is solo polyamory? Ask anyone in the poly community,