Shira B. Katz has rejoined the swingset crew! We celebrate by playing catch up!
We talk about whether Cooper has been fisted, talk about where the head space is between swinging and polyamory, about girls dating girls, and really… we just slide organically from one topic to another until we've burrowed so far down into the rabbit hole it feels like ages since we looked down and said “hey… that's a big hole”.
Podcast: Download (Duration: 1:03:08 — 42.0MB)
1 Comment
I thoroughly agree with Shira – the not knowing who will approach and lead is a “gay girl” thing. Dylan needs to stay out of it, the more he’s in the middle, the more she’s gonna look like “a girl with a husband who wants to potentially explore a relationship with a woman.”
Every dyke has been someone’s “test run with girls” who ended up marrying a dude. The swinger attitude toward women can come off as a bit condescending… like “sure, go date women if you want to because that’s far less intimidating to my dick…” Even if that’s not your specific attitude, it comes off from the community. The assumption with bi women who are married to men, especially swingers, is that your lesbianism is a bonus gift or turn on for the guy. I’m a very genderqueer presenting female, and I’ve never taken my butch lover to a swing club because I don’t feel like that energy is welcome. This all probably comes off as my being the lesbian police or something, and I appologize up front for that, but I just listened to an older episode where Cooper was ranting about how bi people are not bi if they’re in a relationship with someone of one sex, so I’m more angry than I usually am. My typical feeling about the swinger community is that it’s cool if there are queers at the party, but they would never engage in queer culture. It’s like “why don’t they come to our meetings”…
Ok, sorry, I do enjoy the podcast most of the time, because I like all open discussions of sex and relationships. If you’ve gotten this far, I have a bit of advice for Tonia (sp?), it’s always worked for me to be open and ask “hey, are you going to start kissing me now?” or “I’d like to ask you out, is that ok?” something that implies that I’m interested in dating/sexing/flirting the other girl, but that i’m not sure how it’s all supposed to begin. also, bitches like chocolate. 🙂