Browsing: lifestyle

Just got back from a crummy meet and greet experience. Mr. Doubleplay and I ignored some red flags and just neglected to do our homework for this meet up. As a result, in many ways, I feel that we wasted an evening.

The couple that we met was sweet and good looking and discreet. We did right on those issues. But we skipped some steps.

Emma, why are you writing porn?” It whispers paternally. “You should be publishing erudite reflections on philosophy or culture.” Maybe I ought to be pouring my energy into more laudable writing projects. Then again, maybe not. The truth is that I can’t help myself from keeping this online journal, my attempt at critical-reflective, sex journalism.

Last weekend, a Lifestyle girlfriend of mine came to visit with one of her vanilla, recently divorced friends. The friend (we’ll call her Tina) was curious about the Lifestyle, just out of a 20-year marriage, and wanted to go out and have some fun. Turns out, there was a big LS party going on that weekend! Although I knew that my girlfriend would enjoy the party, I was a little nervous about Tina attending with us. Apparently, she had been very sheltered throughout her life, but she was ready to try new things, experiment, and have fun. Well, nothing says fun like a LS party, right?

Through our Craigslist ad, we were approached by a couple significantly younger than us. By significantly, I mean almost 20 years younger. We are almost forty. This couple was just finishing up college.

Plenty of swingers like a little slap and tickle. If you’ve ever had a playmate begging to be treated like a slut in the heat of the moment, you’re already one of us. You’ve engaged in what we call “humiliation play.” If you’ve ever enjoyed a slap to the ass while getting fucked, you’ve engaged in pain play. We communicate about this stuff with a depth of understanding which causes us to need a big vocabulary that can seem very intimidating from the outside.

Today I’m a swinging unicorn, but if you dig through all the other labels I’ve worn over the years, the one that’s always been firmly attached to my psyche is “southern girl.”