Author: Zoe

Zoe first described herself as "bad at monogamy" until about five years ago when she and her husband discovered the term that actually described her: polyamorous. Since then they have opened their family to other partners. Zoe is currently juggling relationships with her husband, their two kids, her husband's girlfriend, and a slew of friends/loves that she calls her tribal poly family. She can be reached on facebook or on twitter @ZoeHanis

My name is Zoe Hanis and I have always abhorred New Years Eve. By the time the family holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas) are over, I am usually sick from exhaustion and stress. So for years I would plan to stay home, perhaps have a few friends over, but nothing serious. This year Guy asked me to spend the evening attending a fancy dinner and play party with him. Dressing “to the nines” is always fun for me. I rarely get to wear my fancy clothes and while I clean up quite well, if I am dressed up then my date…

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Last night I attended a Holiday Party thrown by Guy and his misses. There are a lot of thoughts and feelings that I would like to unpack, though they seem to be fading quickly as fatigue overwhelms me. I had not drunk that much in a couple of weeks and the mix of alcohol and medication has made my stomach rather unhappy today. But it was a wonderful party – well worth the aftereffects. Earlier in the week, I came down with the flu. The first year that I can remember, not getting the flu shot and it hit me.…

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Last night I attended a Holiday Party thrown by Guy and his misses. There are a lot of thoughts and feelings that I would like to unpack, though they seem to be fading quickly as fatigue overwhelms me. I had not drunk that much in a couple of weeks and the mix of alcohol and medication has made my stomach rather unhappy today. But it was a wonderful party – well worth the aftereffects. Earlier in the week, I came down with the flu. The first year that I can remember, not getting the flu shot and it hit me.…

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We are all the product of our past experiences. They make us who we are. But sometimes the past can get in the way of the present. Guy and I are back on track after settling some serious conflicts. I honestly thought that we would not make it, but I have always been rather pessimistic. It started out as not even our problem, but a conflict between Guy and his misses. The more they fought, the more I felt like I should be there for him. He didn’t ask for anything more, but somehow I felt that I needed to…

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My name is Zoe Hanis and I am a coconut. Though I am beginning to wonder if that is not a very good way to go through life. I was listening to the Swingset crew in Desire the other day, when Ginger mentioned that she was a pineapple. Unfortunately, Cooper derailed the conversation before she could explain why she picked that fruit. Though her point regarding different people liking or seeking out different flavors in others was quite valid. A few years ago during a less than sober poker party, Hubby’s girlfriend asked the question, “What kind of fruit are…

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I am not used to being the center of attention. No, that isn’t true – I like being the center of attention in social situations. However, I am not used to simply taking without giving something back. I tend to be an active participant when it comes to sex play; focusing more on my partner’s pleasure than my own. This night was different; I asked for comfort after witnessing the BDSM scene. Chatting naked was a definite distraction; cuddling naked more so. We spoke of my sexual bucket list and the idea of my interest in having him help me…

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My name is Zoe Hanis and I have discovered that not all play parties are created equal. This one was in honor of a friend’s birthday. When the evite showed up, I immediately pounced on it excitedly. This time I was ready: no apprehension, no major conversations; no worries about what to wear or wondering if I would be undesired, I was simply thrilled to go. I wanted to feel that energy again; almost as if one is a part of something so much bigger than themselves, something wonderful and free. The social part of the evening went well, as I…

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My name is Zoe Hanis and I have been called a unicorn. Though I am married, I have been swinging as a single playing with couples. A bit ago, Guy told me of a fantasy he has had; to be fucked while fucking someone else. The idea of watching him play with another guy gets my juices flowing. The idea of participating with them…oh my! So I set about to make this happen. Guy has experience in vetting couples for him and his wife to swing with, but none in finding a single man. Plus he is extraordinarily busy, so…

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My name is Zoe Hanis. I am polyamorous and my parents know. Earlier this week, I sent the letter to my parents and my in-laws. The email went out first thing in the morning; and the wait began. My parents were the first to respond. I found this interesting because they were the ones that we were most worried about. Their email reply was simple: We are not surprised. Although it is not our way of life, we accept it for you as we accept homosexuality in this day and age. We still love you both. Love, Mom & Dad…

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My name is Zoe Hanis and I lie. Not only do I lie, but I have become excellent at it over the years. Polyamory is just now starting to become more well known.  Within the last year or two, it has been in the media more than ever before.  But it is still far from normal. After growing up in a religious conservative household where much seemed to be determined on how it would be perceived by others, one should not be surprised that I hide our lifestyle from my family.  Some might even say that it is kinder to…

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