Author: Duncan

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Duncan lives with his wife the lovely Mrs. Duncan, 2.03 children, their dog and 2 cars in suburban southern New England. Distressingly vanilla on the outside and surprisingly spumoni underneath, the Duncan's are fairly new to the lifestyle and kinksters to boot. They are enjoying all the experiences and discoveries this adventure has to offer. Sharing his thoughts here, Duncan hopes to promote others' personal exploration by sharing his. Writing also helps process the experiences and acts as a personal pensive.

Click to read Part 1 and Part 2. Once you reach sadness and resignation, what do you do? You just keep plugging along. It’s not like you have much choice. Day 75 Another day, another dermatologist appointment. There were still bumps and the Dr. did some more freezing. At this point, Desire was just a few weeks away and there did not seem to be much hope things would clear up by then. What should I do? The Dr. indicated that since I would be covered with a bathing suit, there would be no issue with resort activities. I put…

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Read Part 1 here. Day 33 I have not been emotionally ‘right’ for the past couple of days. Mrs. Duncan has been her usual superb self- full of empathy and support. I am glad to be getting ready to go to the appointment. Hopefully, the dermatologist will tell me my primary care doctor was wrong and it is persistant heatrashius caused by doing yard work on a Sunday preceding a full moon when it is exactly 86.2 degrees out. It is not at all contagious and will clear up in minutes if I just spread this magic cream on it.…

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Molluscum Contagiosum is a benign topical viral skin infection that sounds like a spell you would learn in Hogwarts. Unfortunately, it is an STI in adults for which there is no magic cure. It will go away by itself, but that takes months. I just found out I had it and this is an attempt at keeping a journal about the experience. Unless it is to protect the identities, add context or clean up wording, I have kept this pretty much as a stream of thought to convey where my head was at the time. The hope is that this…

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If you missed part one, read it here. Something else Mrs. Duncan and I did at this Flea was to volunteer with the NELA folks. We had a free slot in the middle of the day Saturday and thought it would be a good idea to give back. We also had some friends who volunteered last year and met some nice people. We wound up helping out at the main check in tables where ID’s are checked against the registration list, Tyvek attendee wristbands are distributed along with event programs, etc. We were handing out programs and maps as well…

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Note: This entry has sat ‘mostly done’ for some time just needing me to apply the final edits. Apologies to Miko for leaving this until now. I am not sure where the tradition of trip reports came from. I know it exists in several corners of the internet and predate the web (yes, Virginia, there were useful parts of the internet that predated the web). Generally, folks share their experiences on a given trip both for the benefit of those who were not able to go and to have a discussion with those who did. Mrs. Duncan and I went…

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Over the past few months, I have seen a lot made of the age in the lifestyle. You see desired age ranges on profiles and even groups (TNG groups are springing up everywhere). On a few occasions recently, this has come up in various ways. We have heard rules from those on the older end of the spectrum precluding younger partners, younger folks not wanting to play with older and folks explicitly say they didn’t care the person’s age. We know 30 year olds with the attitude and fitness of 80 year olds and at least one 60 year old…

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So I posted a link to the post here on coming out to my FetLife account. Surely, it was reasonably safe to come out to my kinky friends about being a swinger. While the VAST majority of feedback I got was positive, there were surprisingly a couple of folks with negative responses. Not the ‘you are an awful person’ type response, but more the ‘hmm, well that’s interesting. I wouldn’t have thought that of you (in a negative way)’ kind of one. Some of these folks are (yes- are still) good friends and I didn’t understand their negativity. In all…

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Listening to the Swingset’s episode 150 got me thinking about coming out again. We are not out to anyone with the exception of two close friends of Mrs. Duncan, and I don’t think they know about our kinky side, just our swingy one. Even the circumstances of our being out to them are a bit interesting. Mrs. Duncan and I have discussed this from time to time, of course. Do we come out to the kids? What about the rest of the family? Certainly our closest friends? But then, we start thinking about if our friends would view us differently.…

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I have been thinking a lot about relationships and impermanence lately. I recently lost someone close to me and that always gets us thinking about the rest of the folks in our lives. On top of this, among my friends and associates, there seems to be a cluster of loss, accentuating the pondering. In episode 127 the Swingset crew were talking about the impermanence of relationships. It had been a tough year, relationship wise, for our intrepid band, and they were discussing the natural ebb and flow of relationships. It was postulated that relationships are impermanent. We need to cherish…

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So we are having dinner one night and I committed a serious breach of etiquette. I made an entire table either uncomfortable or confused in a public restaurant by semi-outing somebody in good faith. Well, now that I have your attention. Please bear with me while I set up some facts needed to bring the story together. Think of it as the first part of a Tom Clancy novel. First, the club we frequent is in Rhode Island. Rhode Island often behaves like a small town on a state scale. You cannot go shopping or out to dinner without running…

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