Adultery and God in the Swinging Lifestyle

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Some swinger haters seem to be particularly riled by my active involvement in my church community. The assumption seems to be that swinging and religion/spirituality are not compatible. I figure it is time for me to state my views on this matter.

First I am of the belief that the spirit that is the source of all is a loving spirit and wants us to be kind to one another, to love one another and to spread peace in this world, not hatred. Certainly this example of love was shared by Jesus as well as Buddha and Mohammad. Given these examples of love and acceptance, I am blown away by the hatred and judgment that occurs in the name of God and Jesus by some who visit this website to pass judgement on swingers as “sinners.”

So first of all, let us learn to be civil to one another. To talk across differences, including those of sexual preferences.

For those out there that are not spewing hatred but who are praying for us and our relationships and hoping that we will return to the ‘right' path, please know that I pray the same for you. I hope that all marriages are based on truth, integrity, honesty and love. I hope that all relationships continue to discuss their bond with the awareness that it is an evolving partnership that requires nurturing, adjustment and ongoing nourishment. Decisions made by partners in this spirit of collaboration are in my mind sacred and in line with spirit. Such decisions jointly made with the intention of deepening love, communication and mutual happiness are the source of the fabric that strengthens communities and keeps marriages, and subsequently families, happy and healthy. Such decisions cannot in my heart be considered adultery.

Rather, adultery is the harboring of secrets between partners. It is a hiding of desires, a silencing of souls, a suppression of desire that comes from spirit and is celebrated through relationships in which honesty and then truest of intentions prevail. Adultery is a lack of communication and a deadening of the spirit of a relationship. It is the squelching of the fire between two souls.

Rest assured worried Christians and others who come to my blog worried about my place in heaven or hell. Know that I am at peace with my God and know in my heart that my marriage follows a positive, rightly ordered, and mindful path. Our marriage is healthy because we tend to it with care. I wish the same for all of you, regardless of what choices may arise from such honest and heartfelt conversations in your partnerships. Peace!

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About Author

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Mrs. Doubleplay is 40-something mom living in the middle of America with kids, a career, and pretty house in the suburbs. She’s active in her local church, coaches the kids’ soccer games, and happens to have a secret life as a swinger. Married to her high school sweetheart, Mr. Doubleplay, the couple dipped their toes in the lifestyle for a couple of years but then dropped off the radar to have kids. They rejoined the lifestyle in 2005 and haven’t looked back. They have been soft swap from the start but are working their way toward greater forms of adventure as we meet hot couples on lifestyle vacations, swinger clubs, and online websites.

4 Comments

  1. Avatar

    This is a kind, goodhearted post, but it still seems like you’re cherry-picking your Bible.  Granted that’s probably a good thing – there are some terrible things in that book! – but it begs the question: if you’re willing to ‘interpret’ the supposedly inviolate word of God until it fits your own life, how can you really say you believe?  I’m sure your church gives you ample opportunity to socialize and that you enjoy that, but maybe you could form friendships and social bonds without the false framework of an outdated text you yourself don’t even adhere to?

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      What do you feel she is cherry picking about the bible, if you don’t mind me asking?

      If anything, I think she’s got both the spirit and letter of the lessons taught by Christ down pat. (My assumption here being she is Protestant, which is my I
      Pression after reading this.)

  2. Avatar

    “Rather, adultery is the harboring of secrets between partners. It is a hiding of desires, a silencing of souls, a suppression of desire that comes from spirit and is celebrated through relationships in which honesty and then truest of intentions prevail. Adultery is a lack of communication and a deadening of the spirit of a relationship. It is the squelching of the fire between two souls.”

    According to scripture it’s simply defined as a man having sex with a betrothed woman *shrug not that what you say doesn’t have anything to do with the act, all things considered… Robbing somebody “nicely” is still theft…

    I’m under the impression that committing Adultery is in some way shape or form a violation of “property” rights (fundamentally inconsequential) albeit I’m sure it can also be spiritually detrimental (thus regarded as “sin”) regardless of how “good” and or “happy” a lifestyle in which married people have “honest” extramarital sexual engagements might make anyone feel…

    “All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not.”

    That said, I’m pretty sure that the so-called “swinging” lifestyle is indeed applicable as “sin” (or a violation of moral code) regardless of how you “see” it so to speak… To each his or her own nevertheless…

    Good luck…

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