Our next and last night in the Big Easy could not have been more different than the first. Five minutes talking to this very hot, very experienced couple had our jaw dropping. Their idea of lifestyle experiences were so much more elaborate and so much more risqué than ours that I felt a bit simplistic in our jaunts. Rather than being the experienced couple, we were the newbies. And much like Ms. Bourbon Street mentioned in a previous blog, I was the gal that had “too many boundaries.”
After a few drinks with Mr and Mrs. Hardcore, we suggested going to the local swinger club—Colette’s. It was very empty because the big Halloween party was the following night. Still, Mr. Doubleplay and I were looking forward to hanging out with this couple in a setting where conversation topics could be louder and more graphic, and flirting across the four of us could occur in an less self-conscious fashion than in an vanilla bar. But when we got to the club, Mr. Hardcore seemed restless. He headed back to their hotel to check them in and came back smelling like a cigar. Mrs. Hardcore wanted to dance a bit –we were the only ones dancing. It was fun but she wasn’t so much about bumping and grinding as doing a pole show for us.
Not that I’m complaining about a pole dance. She wanted me to jump up too but I wasn’t feeling it. But it felt like something felt like it was missing. And you know what it was? Romance. Just like the same tired criticism than men so often get in vanilla relationships. Attention to the little things. Small gestures. The build up. I need it in the swinglife too. And so does Mr. Doubleplay it turns out.
Looking back on the night, there was no flirting, no build up. It felt to us like Mr. and Mrs. Hardcore were just waiting for us to go fuck. They didn’t seem to like the touching, sitting on laps, kisses, dirty dancing, dirty talk about what might happen, compliments of each other. And for us, that’s what gets excited to go to the next level. As Ginger and the Professor’s blog mentioned in March 2010, there are some couples who get off on the foreplay and others who just want to fuck. These folks were all about the fuck.
One of the most beautiful things about the lifestyle is the lack of judgment. This night was challenging my ability not to judge. I liked these people. They were intelligent. Kind. Friendly. Definitely very interesting. And very good looking. But I had to work really hard not to feel a bit creeped out by some of the fantasies. I admire their strength and the hard work that they do in their marriage to make this work. And they seem very happy. It made me very curious about their lifestyle. I want to talk more to them and others about how this REALLY works. I guess vanilla folks would want to ask the same of me.
After the pole dance, Mr. Doubleplay and I grabbed a few moments alone by the bar. We looked at each other and said almost at the same time, “I’m intimidated!” I think if the club was more hopping or if we were with a bigger group, we might have looked elsewhere. It’s not that they weren’t willing to work at our level. Mr. Doubleplay made sure to set the expectations that we were only soft swap that night. We are full swap curious for sure, but Mr. Doubleplay said “Not them, not tonight.” This “extreme” hard core couple was probably not a safe time to stretch our own boundaries.
And bottom line, he made the right call on that one. For one main reason—they were very sweet and willing to play our rules. But it wasn’t HOT for them, much like it wasn’t HOT for me. I had the clear feeling that we were letting them down that night. It gave me an inferiority complex. I felt a bit like they were just satisficing. Kind of like when you play a board game with your kids and let them win and then say, “Wow you did great!” I
Eventually we agreed to head upstairs and begin playing. Mrs. Hardcore wanted to play in the voyeur room. The bulk of the crowd that was there was so very nasty I thought it would be a huge turn off to look and see old scruffy guys and creepy ladies watching us. But it turned out to be great because the windows had double mirrors—they could see us but we couldn’t see them. The room was fantastic as well because it had a huge circular bed, which we realized was the perfect swinger bed for group play. No corners, so no one gets left on the edge.
True to the ‘no foreplay’ conceptions that we had of Mr. and Mrs. Hardcore, they were naked and fucking before Mr. Doubleplay was even in the room. We tend to finish with fucking but only after a long build-up of other things. But fair enough. I sucked and kissed different places as they got busy. I spanked her hard as they fucked and she really liked that. She then went down on me and I really enjoyed having his dick in my mouth as she did. She was very talented with her tongue but didn’t linger as long as I needed.
Fitting with their rough play, each of them grabbed my hair very tightly at different points. A bit too tightly but not enough that it hurt. But enough that I started to wonder, “This is fine but what comes next??” It was a little distracting. Then he fucked her again and I got underneath to lick her clit as she ground into him. She sucked Mr. Doubleplay’s cock a bit and then asked him to pull her hair back very, very hard. Things get blurry then but we did give Mr. Doubleplay a double blow job since that is his most favorite wish. But again, not enough lingering for us. Quickly back to fucking! We ended with Mr. Doubleplay fucking me off the edge of the bed. Mrs. Hardcore finished her guy off by having him come in her mouth.
After we finished, Mr. Hardcore was very gentle. I sat between him and Mr. Doubleplay and put my hand on Mr. Hardcore’s thigh. He stroked my hand in a way that was very, very hot to me. As hot as the fucking, honestly. Because damn, he was handsome. And when we parted he said very earnestly that he thought I was quite adorable. Not in a patronizing way at all.
Bottom line, I confirmed this evening that it’s all a matter of perspective as to what is wild and crazy. We think of course that we have had some very wild times. Ms. Bourbon Street would say the same, and just the day before I was lamenting how to them it was a wild and crazy night and to us it was a bit mellow.
The tables were turned on us with Mr. and Mrs. Hardcore. After what was to us some very hot group play in a room with about 10 people watching as we sucked, fucked, and got in on an a whole array of ways. As we walked out of the club, we exchanged some kisses all around. Mrs. Hardcore ended the evening by saying, “I’m glad it was a mellow evening. We were a bit tired tonight.” Yep, it’s all a matter of perspective.