A Modest Proposal: Should Ginger and Cooper Fuck?

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Let’s speak honestly and earnestly about a key question on the Swingset: Should Ginger and Cooper fuck?

Perhaps you may consider it a wildly inappropriate question on this site of the open-minded and sexually adventurous. It really is up to them, right? From the podcast and relentless Twitter flirting, they clearly want to. And let me go on record as saying that with all the built up anticipation between the two of them…I’d be in the front row watching all that hotness!

In thinking about how this could affect their dynamic on the show, however, someone has to point out many a show were utterly ruined–trashed I’d dare say–when the protagonists were unable to keep a lid on the sexual tensions. Need I really point out the examples? Let’s go on a tour:

Fox Mulder and Dana Sully – Perhaps the closest comparisons available to the nerdy-ness that is Cooper and Ginger, the first hints of a consummated romantic relationship between the two came in Season 7. Is it coincidence–or even a conspiracy–that ratings started declining until the show was canceled two years later?

Sam Malone and Diane Chambers – One of the staples of my youth sitcom days and well before I truly understood the New England mentality as I do now, Cheers was a favorite–that is, until Sam actually proposed to Diane. The following season was a disaster and long train-wreck of not-so-funny romantic overtures. Luckily, the writers were clever enough to get rid of Diane and replace her with Kirstie Alley’s character. Bam! Sexual tension is there again and the show enjoys a long run.

Rachel Green and Ross Geller. Ring a bell for anyone? The other hosts of Swingset may be well-advised to take note of the awkwardness on Friends after Rachel and Ross’s steam was released. It was just weird after that.

James Ford (Sawyer) and Dr. Juliet Burke – According to Lostpedia, “Suliet is the fan-given nickname to the romantic pairing between Sawyer and Juliet. It is part of the love quadrangle featuring Jack, Kate, Sawyer and Juliet. The other parts are known as Jate, Skate and Jacket.” That logic would make make Cooper and Ginger into Gooper. I watched every episode of Lost. If I actually understood it, I’m sure there’d be a lesson in there for Cooper and Ginger. Then again, maybe Swingset would make for a better love bunch. By my count it’d be Gooper, Dinger (Dylan-Ginger), Shirper (Shira-Cooper), Girha (Ginger-Shira), and Shiryan (Shira-Dylan). And that’s just for the latest cohort. I’m sure the authors of swingsetapedia will get all the combinations down for us.

Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big – Yes, I’m man enough to admit that I also watched every episode of Sex and the City, and loved it! To this day, the Cosmo remains my drink of choice, and that Mr. Big was nothing but trouble for Carrie. Yes, he did redeem himself in the movie and yes, I cried.

Maddie Hayes and David Addison – Could there possibly be a better pre-coitus TV show than Moonlighting? Were you as surprised as I was that when the thing that we all wanted to happen actually did happen that it wasn’t interesting any longer? Is it just me or was this experience so traumatic to Cybil Shepherd’s TV persona that she actually changed her orientation on The L Word?

It’s time to weigh in as devoted listeners of the podcast, readers of the site, and Twitter followers on the centrality of this question. Is it too Modest a Proposal for Gooper to hold out for their fans…to let the slow simmer turn to a full boil…to tease versus please…to wait versus cum?

Ah, fuck it. Just get it on. While your at it, make sure to include Dinger, Shirper, Girha, and Shiryan. Just let us know when so we can all watch.

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16 Comments

  1. I've never posted an article and then gone right to the comments to participate in the discussion, but i'm strangely compelled to do so here. I will agree that Mulder and Scully fucking was an act of desperation on the part of a network trying to deal with an increasingly unpopular show, but the REAL thing that killed that series was the godawful alien oil conspiracy that just got denser and denser.

    I will also give you Sam & Diane, and the Moonlighting characters. I know nothing about Sex in the City as I refused to watch beyond the first episode (not that I don't like chick shows & stories, LOVE Bridget Jones Diary, for instance)

    I take specific issue with two shows, though.

    First, Lost. Juliet was an afterthought, only thrown into the show after the Jack/Kate/Sawyer dynamic was thrown into the crapper. The REAL tension here was between Kate and Sawyer, and Kate fucked him so she could steal his gun. Oh yes.

    Second, Friends. As a fan of every season except the hasty/awful/out of character season 10 I will emphatically state that you cannot say the show went down hill after episode 15 of season 2 (The One Where Ross and Rachel…You Know") Ross and Rachel getting together was intended to happen, and actually much of the sexual tension came after they then split up again.

    Which brings me to the meat of my case. As Ginger lives quite far from me (approximately 1,125 miles, depending on your route…) our sexual relationship can hardly become the focus of our little show due to lack of regularity. (Which is, let's be honest, what REALLY killed the above shows…characters spending far more time focusing on their new sex life and far less time focusing on finally explaining what the fuck was going on with that alien black oil conspiracy…and what the deal was with the fucking bees….I'm NOT bitter)

    More to the point though, since I have no doubt that Ginger tops the charts when it comes to the "amazing in bed" …um…chart, I would imagine that our sex would be so incredible that it would become something I crave, and yearn for…you know, more than I already do… Which would, in tern, make it EVEN HARDER to swallow the fact that we live the aforementioned 1,125 miles apart and therefor cant fuck ALL THE TIME creating a sort of UBER sexual tension, the likes of which The Swingset has never seen.

    Though, all this said…I think I'd like to hear more about the Shira – Ginger matchup. Let's throw Marilyn in there and sell tickets.

    • I completely agree with your argument about the X-Files; I can't believe how bad it jumped the shark. Not that I was really interested in the sexual tension between the protagonists, considering my youth at the time. Everyone likes to point fingers at the resolution of sexual tension as the reason why great shows go bad, but in this case I would like to point fingers at desperate writers who couldn't come up with good story ideas after tossing around almost everything that's ever been a part of a science fiction or conspiracy novel or show. "Hell, what's left?" "Hmm… how about we let Scully and Mulder hook up?" "That's a terrible idea, but unless we can come up with anything better…." Once the two of them moved on, the show picked up.

      Since LotS is less about writing and more about experiences, I doubt that resolution of one sexually tense relationship will doom the series. I make the assumption that everyone involved is mature enough to handle the emotional and physical repercussions of sexual gratification and resolution of intense tension and not go off the deep end. (Isn't that what every first time sort of feels like?)

      I won't make any predictions, but I posit two scenarios.

      1. Cooper and Ginger fuck, and use the experience both as a catalyst for a great LotS show and as an enhancement to their lives and relationships.

      2. Cooper and Ginger do not fuck, and use the experience both as a catalyst for a great LotS show and as an enhancement to their lives and relationships.

      • Brian…you know what happens when you ASSUME! (ASS U ME)

        I posit a THIRD and even MORE interesting scenario. Cooper and Ginger fuck ON a LotS show… HMMMM

        • Your third scenario sounds a lot like the first scenario. (Oh how I do love the double entendre.)

          And yes, I've experienced the end result of assumptions on more than one occasion. I try to make educated assumptions these days—far safer, but still staggeringly awkward.

  2. omfg yes!! they need to fuck and they need to do it soon! i have no doubt whatsoever that the two of them will still be just as sexy, flirty and entertaining on the podcast as ever before even after they do it. in fact, i imagine they may even have some hot stories to share afterward. 😉

    seriously, i've listened to all the shows and the chemistry between the two of them is pure awesome. i vote yes! and i'll even chuck a pretty please in there for good measure. <3

  3. Oooo gee, compelling arguments on both fronts… but then it's a bit like the argument of actually living a fantasy versus keeping it as a fantasy. Some people like the heat and passion of the scenario in their mind, and let's face it, most of us have a REALLY good imagination so it's no wonder there is a resistance to living it when it may not live up to our expectations… That said, and I talk now from personal experience, often the fantasy has elements in it that don't come up in the imagination and while sometimes the first time isn't as good as it was in my head, often when I go back for seconds or thirds it gets even better – as sex did when we first started…

    So after all that blah blah… my final thought is to just fuck!! Then report on the experience, do it again and again and tell us how it evolves! hehe, I'm pretty sure that it won't affect the ratings as there are quite a few voyeuristic peeps out there that will just want to know more 😛

    Enjoy!

  4. Leave it to Prof to examine the scenario from all sides with his clever and dry wit. I always enjoy reading his perspective after hearing little snipits in conversation. He made his interests pretty clear which is so fucking hot.

    As for the question at hand…is there anything more delicious than teasing?! I love the anticipation and build up. What would my days be like without the sexually-charged banter, flirting and planning for Swingset with the brilliant and sexy Cooper?

    Your guess is as good as mine as to what erotic delights will ensue when we land in the same room. As for the ultimate question, I offer: Do people make the trek to Everest to partially climb the mountain or to summit? Just saying.

    xoxo~ Ginger

    • I watch the Tour de France every year, and every year cyclists refuse to drop out because of broken bones, ailments, and horrible injuries of all kinds. Each time this occurs, the announcers explain the motivation to stay in the race by describing the ascension of Everest: once you start something of that magnitude, you simply must finish. Despite hardships, pain, and suffering, turning back is not an option. There is too much at stake.

      I am not insinuating that pain, suffering, and broken bones may be involved in this situation, but I suggest that once the first step is taken, it may be impossible not to follow through.

      The question then becomes, "has the first step already been taken?"

    • I'm pretty sure I've NEVER made a cutesy pouty face…so I can promise you I won't while fucking Ginger. To me it looks like the models are pondering the question…

  5. Far be it for me to argue with the Prof, but I think there is a profound difference between the TV relationships he describes and the proposed Cooper/Ginger hook-up. The Sam/Diane, Rachel/Ross, Lost quadrangle and others all soured because after sex they wanted some kind of a relationship. When that didn't pan out – where does a monogamous married couple belong in the X-Files, anyway – the shows fizzled.

    The difference with Coopers and Ginger – and sexually social folks as I imagine – is that they just want to fuck and maybe have a friendship. No drama, no romance – just play.

    So I say Gooper should become real! Go fuck like bunnies – and then record a podcast in the afterglow!

  6. Ginger and Cooper difinitely should fuck. Swinging is about enjoying sexual intercourse with someone other than you mate, wife or husband.

    My wife’s married girlfriend, Dana, and I are good friends with a strong sexual desire for each other. Dana calls me her boyfriend, gets cosy, and, indicates a definite desire for sexual intercourse between the two of us. I would love to fuck Dana while her hubby, Don,  watches as the two of us fuck to orgasam. I would love to watch her hubby play with and my wife and then the two may fuck to orgasm.

    The fly in the ointment is that Dana and Don are a vanilla couple. They are both swinger virgins and Dana is still unsure if she is OK taking another guys penis in her vagina for the intercourse to orgasm that will follow.

    So, we have to work it out with this couple so we make them comfortable with swinging and swapping mates with us for sexual intercourse so I get to fuck Dana. 

    Fucking Dana or someone else’s wife or girlfriend I find attractive should definitely happen sooner or later.

    The point is Ginger and Cooper should fuck and enjoy themselves sexually.

  7. Well well well. Lots to consider. Would the dynamic of the podcast change? Probably. Would that be good or bad? Hard to tell. But once they do it, they can’t undo it. And, as per the nature of LoSS, and the two in question, we would hear about it. Isn’t swinging really simply acting on fantasies? And we all know that doesn’t always pan out we we hoped. But then, when it does….

    • … oh dear. 🙂

      The fucking happened and it was spectacular. It however resulted in the Swingset throwdown of 2012, followed by the Swingset meltdown of 2012, followed by the Swingset recovery and reclamation orgy (Swingset R&R) of 2013.

      This is a wonderful bit of Professor shanenigans from 2010 and i’m glad it’s still entertaining us all. 🙂

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