Ask A Swinger: Un-Circumcised Men In The Swinging Lifestyle

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Do uncircumcised men have a problem in the lifestyle? Are some / many women likely to reject a guy because of it? When is a good time to bring it up with the other couple – in the profile? first date? Not mention it at all and have the female be surprised?

– Extra Skin

Hi Extra Skin,

Dylan here, Life on the Swingset's resident (read: token) uncircumcised male here!

There are so many ways people can find exactly what they want in the lifestyle, height, weight, hair color, personality type, and that's even before talking directly to anyone! Circumcision status is usually an option, a checkbox, or just something to add to your profile to fill it out,

However, unless someone's profile lists specifically, “only circumcised men”, I wouldn't even bother mentioning it. In my experiences it's never been a problem, an issue, or even really a topic of conversation before or after sex with another couple. I can't imagine circumcision status being a deal breaker unless it's been specifically addresses in someone's profile, there are so many other things that go into finding out whether you are compatible as a couple and as people, by the time someone's reaching down your pants to give you a tug and wiggle there's already at least a little chemistry there. So own it! Be proud, and enjoy it.

If you're a little self-conscious about it, go ahead and list it in your profile. Anyone willing to drill down profiles by circumcision status may not be the kind of people you're looking for anyway, but don't bother mentioning it on a date… I can just imagine walking into a first date with a new couple and throwing it in there during an open moment.

“… and oh man, those Cubs were terrible last night, weren't they?” “Terrible! Also, I'm uncircumcised so I hope that's cool.”

*awkward silence*

So final answer is most women won't reject a guy based on circumcision status, and IF you want to mention it, drop it in your profile and leave it there.

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About Author

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As a co-host on Life on the Swingset and creator of The Gentleperverts' Social Club, Dylan Thomas speaks candidly about nonmonogamy, kink, and non-normative sexuality to eradicate the stigma and shame that keep people from expressing and being who they want. He brings awareness to issues involving gender identity, equal rights, and intersectionality by creating discussions with people who feel unaffected by them. He also creates learning opportunities for men to become stronger allies and better people. Find and feel free to engage him on Twitter.

4 Comments

  1. Ginger

    I find the uncircumcised cock to be wildly sexy! Not neutral, not tolerated, but positively sexy! I know I am not alone. The idea of variety is what makes many swingers hot. No man should ever apologize or be self-conscious about such things.

    • Avatar

      While I am circumcised, my wife loves uncircumcised cocks. …not just for the variety… and she doesn’t just tolerate them, but she loves them. It is a huge turn on for her; even to the point where she will complement a guy specifically because he is un-cut. From our experiences in the lifestyle, I wouldn’t consider her position to be an odd position and an uncircumcised cock certainly isn’t something to worry about.

  2. Avatar

    Never had a problem with it. Never even thought twice about it.

    Then again, I come from a weird place where they frown upon cutting off part of a kids genitals for no good reason 🙂

  3. Avatar

    i am a circumcised man, and i have had a few encounters with other men (in my young dumb college days). from what i have learned, thought about later, and felt for the longest time; i find the intact man to be quite interesting. i have never been able to know my foreskin and i guess i am kind of jealous of you and those who still have theirs. if left to my own devices, i would most likely sit there and play wit it, look, and explore. my personal preference if i had to choose between a cut and uncut guy, i would go with the uncut. that’s just me. my wife hasn’t had a lot of experience with the lifestyle or uncut men, so she is hesitant. but i think that will pass. its more of a first-time experience nerves thing.

    if i could offer one request. please dont be ashamed of it. you are what mothers make their children to be, i am what society dictated. for that alone you should be proud and even do a chicken dance on top of a table nude.

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