Our First Swinger Date Flashback Post

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Flashback post! I was reading through a bunch of old blog posts and came across something I wrote after our first swinger date approximately two and a half years ago. Amazing how things have and haven't changed in that time. Enjoy some classic Kat.

After looking at profiles for weeks and never acting on them, I finally took the plunge and decided to flirt with a cute local couple on Kasidie, a swinger dating site. Crazily enough, I heard back immediately with a reciprocal flirt and an invitation to look at their private (extremely HOT and way dirtier than I could ever imagine taking) photos. We chatted back and forth, they hoped to get together that night but weren’t ready to be that spontaneous, so we set up a date for the next evening to meet for drinks and see where things went from there.

I was so nervous all the next day. Were they going to like us? Was my undercarriage grooming up to par? I don't have a porn pussy. Was my undercarriage itself up to par? We should totally cancel! What was I thinking? But eventually we were on our way to their neighbourhood so we could go back to their place if all went well during our drinks meeting at the restaurant. (I went for ‘sexy secretary' look in a pencil skirt in which my ass looks bangin' if I do say so myself, and a top that draped nicely to show off my rack)

We hit it off pretty quickly and I was so relieved. Even if we didn't hook up it was going to be a fun evening and we easily chatted about various things in our lives, relationships, and our experiences (or lack of in our case) in the lifestyle. As we talked about what clubs we'd been to, we realized that we recognized them from a couple events at the local swingers club. I specifically remembered her hand down the pants of a guy who'd approached them with his wife (I assume) and thinking, ‘Wow! This is real. People really do this.'

They'd been a couple for about a year, and she'd been in the lifestyle when they met. He hadn't been sure about the whole thing but after a crazy hotel takeover weekend in Vegas, he was sold. The date all felt really comfortable and effortless, even when I knocked over my glass of wine onto her, and we had a ton in common in a lot of ways, so after a few drinks we headed to their place just a few blocks away.

We ended up playing a silly strip card game and soon enough I was sitting completely naked in the dining room of complete strangers and I began to freak out a little. If we'd been doing sexual things and I was naked, it would have been fine, but I was just sitting there. Nude. It was really odd. (I'm kind of a ‘never nude'. I'm getting better but I often don't like to be naked even when completely alone. I've got a running gag with a friend about how I wear jean shorts in the shower.) Noticing my discomfort, they got me a robe to wear until I felt better, and that consideration helped me come back to myself and out of the panic spiral.

Eventually, the game got a sexier and we all started having to do little dares that got more and more intimate – a lap dance here, some inner thigh kissing there. A lot of the dares ended up with people going down on me and I really liked that. Like, really liked that. I kept joking that all the tasks should be ‘do shit to Kat' because having three different mouths on you in very short order is one of the best things ever. Until there's maybe four or five or… mmm, happy place.

Things progressed into the bedroom and we all rolled around and kissed and sucked and licked and fingered and fucked and it was really awesome. I hadn't been sure if we'd just pair off with the other couple or how it would work but there was a lot of mixing and matching and it was delightful. There were often bodies on either side of me and on top of me and I just loved being surrounded by all that amazing naked, writhing flesh.

All good things must come to an end, though, and after discovering it was nearly 3am, we had to bow out and head home while I could still operate a motor vehicle.

We exchanged a few flirty texts – ha! flirty = “We're really horny to fuck you two” – after but we haven't heard back from them after my texts trying to set up the next date they'd appeared eager to schedule. So we'll see.

But it was a great night. A lot of fun. And it took the edge off the fear of the unknown. And answered the question “Who'd want to fuck us?” because there are at least two people out there who put their hands up, which helps to suggest that there are more out there. We just need to find them.

Now, who should I flirt with next?

 

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Kat (she/they) is a sex-positive, geeky, Canadian, pansexual, deviant, slutty, feminist pervert who came to ethical non-monogamy 21-years into her relationship with her husband. After a quick toe-dip to test the waters (and hours of obsessive reading and podcast consumption), they dove in and they almost can't imagine they ever lived any other way. Labels never give a totally clear picture, but they consider themselves non-monogamous and polyamorous, though they occasionally swing. She's also a podcaster - On The Wet Coast Podast - and audiobook narrator for Cooper S Beckett's novels A Life Less Monogamous and Approaching the Swingularity. onthewetcoast.com @WetcoastKat on Twitter. Their first book - Yelling In Pasties: The Wet Coast Confessions of an Anxious Slut - is available on Amazon.com, Amazon.ca, Inkterra, and Kobo.

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