My Montreal: A Swinger’s Mecca

You’re probably familiar with the cobblestoned charm of my city’s Old Port district, the delicacies of its French cuisine, or perhaps even its ebullient, vanilla nightlife. But did you know that Montreal is also a swingers’ Mecca? I don’t mean underground, exclusive house parties or sex off-premises bars – although these scenes exist here too. What I’m talking about are on-premises, fully exposed threesomes, foursomes, orgies, and gangbangs. Get the word out, people: In my hometown, having sex at a swinger’s club is legal.

A Little History
We are indebted to a man named Jean-Paul Lebaye, owner of the notorious L’Orage Club, for our community’s legal emancipation. Founded in 1996, L’Orage continues to host intimate soirées for paying members. To this day, it is reputed to be the gangbang club of choice among discerning female swingers on account of the high calibre of its male clientele.

After a seven-year court battle initiated by a police raid of L’Orage in 1998, the Supreme Court of Canada finally ruled in favour of sex clubs in 2005 on the basis that they cause society no harm. The outcome? In Canada, it was now legal to have sex at swingers’ clubs, provided that the club in question was “private,” i.e., required the purchase of a membership. Wanna get the inside scoop on the scene in 2011? Below you will find a review of my two favourite Montreal sex clubs: L’Orage and Le Celeste.

Five-Star Fun: My Two Favourite Clubs
L’Orage Club: Don’t be fooled by its unassuming storefront on St-Hubert Street. As you walk into the dimly lit vestibule with its suggestive red glow, the only thing keeping you from living out your wildest fantasies is a thick curtain separating the outside world from the escapist playground you will find inside the club.

Once you’ve made your entrance, three distinct spaces beckon you, each with its own potential for pleasure. You can start off slow by chillin’ out at the bar and surveying the crowd on the dance floor. On hot nights, the action starts here – I once saw a foursome (three guys, one gal) start to play in the go-go dancer cage.

The next space is for experienced players only – the action is hardcore, and there is literally nowhere to hide: The room is full of double beds, some elevated on platforms, others tucked away in corners. In terms of décor, picture a large loft space whose dark walls, hanging transparent curtains, and Doric columns offer a nod to the orgiastic rites of ancient Rome.

If you’re in the mood for something a little more cozy, make your way upstairs to the second floor. The outdoor patio offers players a space to relax after a hook-up (FYI: No fucking on the balcony, unless you wanna get nailed for indecent exposure). On the other hand, the secluded playroom featuring four beds and some groovy tunes to get you into the right head space provides a more intimate area for couples and singles to get freaky.

Need a bathroom break? You’ll find private toilets equipped with mouthwash, towels, wet wipes, and condoms on every floor, but the Roman Room toilets are the coolest, with their wall-to-wall French porn cartoons.

Some final pointers: I’ve been able to gauge that the average age at L’Orage ranges from early 30s to mid-40s, although well-maintained, older couples do make the rounds sometimes. Also, most players tend to be attractive, clean, middle class or well-to-do (its is not unusual to see a handful of Porsches line the street on summer Saturday nights).

Curious to learn more? Make sure to check out L’Orage Club’s bilingual website: http://www.orage-club.ca/home.html

Le Celeste: A haven for first timers, soft swingers, and exhibitionists on account of its private and semi-private rooms, Le Celeste boasts of play areas that will appeal to your most voluptuous fantasies. Do you dream of being ravished in a Chinese brothel? Ever wanted to get your freak on at a peep show? What about sucking off your man (or the man next to him) at a glory hole? The list of marvellous play spaces goes on, including: a Jacuzzi; a jungle-themed, mirrored, black-light room; a pussy-eating room with a one-way viewing window; a barren confessional chamber complete with a prie-dieu and its antithesis, the sex swing; not to mention a large dance floor; pool tables; a non-alcoholic bar; and a midnight buffet for when you get the post-sex munchies.

Unlike at L’Orage Club, where all beds are open, Le Celeste offers players the opportunity to negotiate the participation of other guests by means of visual barriers. Rooms have either a chain, a door, or both, depending on where they are located. Couples can use the chain to allow others to watch, or can close the door for more privacy. If you are selective about whom you’d like to invite to share your intimacy, I recommend using the chain to screen possible sex partners.

The lowdown: Le Celeste used to be located on St-Hubert Street, but after a suspicious fire bombing it reopened at its current site on highway 40 in St-Leonard. Perhaps on account of its previous location’s easy accessibility by public transit, the club used to draw a younger, urban, 30-something crowd. The vibe has changed considerably since then; during this past winter the average age was a lot older (50+) and considerably more suburban. (No offence to the older generation, but having sex in front of out-of-shape couples who are the same age as my parents was a big turn-off!) However, my man and I checked it out again as recently as this early June, and the trend seemed to swing again in favour of a younger, more refined set of players.

Curious to learn more? Check out their website: http://www.leceleste.com/en/the-celeste.html